New Crisis For My Family

[Nancy]

"Fiddle-dee-dee, I'll worry about that tomorrow", to borrow an expression from one of literature's most famous "survivors", who remained undaunted while everything around her was going to ruins, Scarlet O'Hara--It's Saturday.

Find something today that relaxes you, whatever it is, and DO IT, today and tomorrow.

The bills and everything else can wait until next week.

Clear that mind. Think of much happier times. It takes some discipline, and is like meditation, but you CAN do it. It's like giving yourself a little private "spa" time.

 

[Mary]

"Fiddle-dee-dee, I'll worry about that tomorrow", to borrow an expression from one of literature's most famous "survivors", who remained undaunted while everything around her was going to ruins, Scarlet O'Hara--It's Saturday.

Find something today that relaxes you, whatever it is, and DO IT, today and tomorrow.
The bills and everything else can wait until next week.
Clear that mind. Think of much happier times. It takes some discipline, and is like meditation, but you CAN do it. It's like giving yourself a little private "spa" time.

Ross and Nancy,
I've been accused (and not in a complimentary way) of resembling Scarlet due to my
I'll think about it tomorrow. Tomorrow is another day! outlook. So, to borrow another cliche:
Ross, JUST DO IT!

 

[tobagotwo]

I apologize if I'm repeating someone - I've been away, and haven't waded through all these replies yet, but still want to put in my two cents...

Ross, when you're nearing the end of your rope, it's food first. Then rent/mortgage. (Okay, for you - Oxygen first, then food...)

Then electic/phone.

The hospital bills are not number one. (Sounds like they're giving you a lot of number two, anyway.) They're like number seven. Remember, those office managers will sleep just fine anyway, even if you have no place to sleep at all. Nor will they skip any meals because you are hungry.

They cannot continually harrass you. It is against the law. They should realize that if you can't pay immediately, their best chance is to discuss a payment plan that you can go for over time. Hold off on the hospital bills until you're sure you're getting by for the month - then send only a token payment. They'll deal with you. If you lose everything, they get nothing. It works best for them for you to have a stable situation.

If you're actually, absolutely positive you're going bankrupt, do it before President Bush's new bankruptcy law goes into effect, where you get all the restrictions of bankruptcy, but still keep - and pay - all your bills anyway (what good is that..?). Interestingly, medical bills were precisely the reason the bankruptcy laws used to be so lenient in this country, to give people a second chance. The new, tougher laws are aimed at credit card abusers, but I don't know that they make any distinction between them and unsinsured medical bill victims.

And don't worry about it between payments. If you have no money, there is nothing your pain and worry will help in the situation, nor prove to anyone. The truth is, to the office managers, it's just a job, and you're just one person among many they want to collect funds from. It's not even the least bit personal. They don't go home and talk about you, think bad thoughts about you, or even think about you at all, so don't even consider that they have any opinion about you at all - they don't.

Oxygen. Food. Rent.

Best wishes,

 

[Granbonny]

Question?

Question?

Not just for Ross...but, if someone cannot afford to pay off their bills...and hospitals, doctors and everyone else that stuck their head in the door.. turn the bill over to collections agents..what is the most they can do????? If you don't have a job..???They cannot collect from your employer. (take away wages)??? I realize it will go on your credit report..if you want to buy a new car, ect......I had to help son with paying off the odds and ends from Grandson's 2 stays in hospital last year...Misdiagnosed.. Ruptured appendix. (Even after Insurance had paid ..still around $1,000.00) ....When my B/I/L died from a dissection of his heart valve..15 years ago..sister was harrased for a year.. Family helped with paying off the smaller ones..but, when she got a huge bill...(Cannot remember who sent it..but was in the thousands of dollars. she told them..she would send $10.00 a month. After a few months..they wrote it off... She had no job..and was raising 2 teenage boys....Sold the large house with pool and moved into smaller home..Got herself a job..boys got scholarships to College. One to AirForce Academy in Co. .... she was lucky....Didn't mean to hijack Ross's thread...but, I hate when bad things happen to GOOD people...Bonnie

 

[scardycat]

New Crisis For My Family

Last night, my wife came home from work and shortly after, started having severe abdominal pain and vomitting. I ended up taking her to the ER last night. After 2 CATSCANS, they've found a cyst on her left kidney that is bleeding into and around the kidney and some blood is getting up into her abdomen. After her last layoff, they raised the health insurance premium so high that we could not afford it. People, don't go there!

I just got off the phone with the Doctor. He said that she has a deformed kidney that is barely functioning at all and that is it going to have to be removed. He want's to see how she does today and if there is any improvement. If not, he's talking emergency surgery to remove the entire left kidney, possibly tomorrow.

For once, I'm asking for prayers from all of you for my family. I have no idea how we're going to deal with this. Did you ever feel like you can never get a break no matter how hard you try?

I will pray for your wife and for you & your family. I know what you are going thru. I am feeling extreme stress right now with two very close people in my family that are going thru life threatening health ordeals. And I just hope and pray every moment that everything will turn out all right. The only thing that is keeping me going is to go moment to moment.I will keep nothing but good thoughts for all of you.

 

[MelissaM]

I'm a big fan of the $10 a month club. The first time I got sick, the bills were in the thousands. At the time, I was on a $300/month stipend. After that, I moved to making $800 a month. On good months, I sent $20/month, on bad months, I sent $10. It took several years to pay off the debt, but no creditors hounded me. My grandparents also took this route. I think they took 15 years to pay off the debt. Interest free, of course.

 

[hensylee]

Ross, I think our Honda lady, Melissa, is right. I have a friend who sees doctors all the time. She owes them all, but pays a small amount to each of them every month. I think as long as you pay them SOMETHING each month, they can't do anything to you - maybe not even contact. Just don't sign anything that says you will pay $50/month because they can hound you for that amount, even if you have paid a smaller amount - in fact don't sign anything, just pay the $5.00/month. Even those amounts add up and it won't be easy. I think there are many, many people who are in the exact spot you are in, and there are going to be many more. oUr medical providers might as well get used to it. They have used us up.

My advice to my children when they grew up and were ready to be on their own is:

"pay your mortgage/rent first so that you always have a place to live. You can use lamps for light, get food from friends, neighbors, take a bath somewhere else, bring water from their house." As time passes and your find out where you really are, financewise, you will be better able to assess your position. Right now you are a leaf in the wind and insecurity is definitely an enemy for you. I have no advice on how to not be that leaf, tho. No way, I guess.

Thinking of y'all all the tiem.

 

[JimL]

We were in the $10/month club a few years ago, paying for our daughter who decided to come via c-section rather than a normal delivery, so much higher costs. The hospital was always happy to receive something from us. They never threatened to come and repossess our daughter.

 

[Ross]

The Official Word-SURGERY TUESDAY THE 24TH A.M.

The kidney is functioning less then 25%. The surgeon is going to go in and see if the kidney is any better then what the scan showed. If it is, he'll repair the defect. If it's as bad or worse then shown, complete left kidney removal will be done.

There it is folks. Now the real nervousness starts.

 

[Mary]

I guess there's something to be said for having a definitive plan of action, Ross. You need to concentrate on helping Lyn, and we'll concentrate on
helping you. You've got your army behind you.

 

[Peggy in Alaska]

Geez, Ross, I am really sorry to hear this news. I hope all goes well with the surgery on the 24th.

Peggy in Alaska

 

[Debrinha GT]

Second half!

Second half!

Dear Ross, at least now you know for sure what needs done. No more wondering. The two of you have a whole week to get emotionally prepared for the procedure now, as well as get everything ready just like we all do before our heart surgeries. How's Lynn feeling about the whole thing? I'm sure there are many folks here who have or have had kidney issues and would be very happy to be of help if she needs advice. I know that your've acted as her spokesman,(not sure how to spell) but would she not feel better if she herself posted? Just a thought. I'll be praying more than ever for the two of you. Take care!
Débora

 

[Harrybaby666]

Of Course You Know......This Means PRAYER!!!!! LOL

Of Course You Know......This Means PRAYER!!!!! LOL

The Official Word-SURGERY TUESDAY THE 24TH A.M.

The kidney is functioning less then 25%. The surgeon is going to go in and see if the kidney is any better then what the scan showed. If it is, he'll repair the defect. If it's as bad or worse then shown, complete left kidney removal will be done.

There it is folks. Now the real nervousness starts.

Hi Ross,
I am so very sorry to hear this, but you know you have all of us praying for you, Lyn and your family. Sending you a big hug and tons of prayers that we will get through our travesties. Harrybaby

 

[Phyllis]

Will be watching and waiting Ross- we wish Lynn a successful surgery on the 24th and we know you will give her all the support she needs as you do with all your VR.com buddies.

 

[tobagotwo]

Well, that's not exactly what you wanted to hear. Nonetheless, it breaks the suspense. He's going to take good care of her, Ross.

You and Lyn are in our thoughts and our hearts, Ross.

Best wishes,

 

[M&M]

Dear Ross and Lyn - I wanted to wish you all the best on your surgery.

I'm sure I don't have to tell you in all likelihood things are going to get worse before they get better. The waiting is so hard and I'm sure its terrible to be feeling so awful.. But, I'm sure she's in good hands and will be up on her feet in no time.

Take it one step at a time - one day at a time.. Your doing wonderfully. Your both going to come through this and weeks from now - this will all be a dream and she'll be feeling a whole lot better. I'll be saying a prayer for her. Please keep us posted when you can.. Please give Lyn lots of Hugs, Hugs, and More Hugs..

Marilyn (runner)

 

[Granbonny]

Ross

Ross

We will all be praying that he can do a repair to the bad part.... and not have to have the kidney removed.. Will she have her surgery in Canton?...Take care of yourself..Bonnie

 

[Guest]

The Official Word-SURGERY TUESDAY THE 24TH A.M.

Wow...now that's what I call a clear announcement .

Good luck! You know thoughts and prayers are coming your way!


Cort, "Mr MC" / "Mr Road Trip", 31swm/pig valve/pacemaker
'72,6,9/'81,7.hobbies.chdQB = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort/
MC Guide = http://www.chevyasylum.com/mcspotter/main.html
"We got mountains to climb" ... Rod Stewart ... 'Broken Arrow'

 

[Karlynn]

Lyn, as well as yourself, will be so covered in prayer! So it looks like next Tuesday will be the day the road to recovery starts.

 

[gadgetman]

Ross,

That "RED" posting set off my Transitions® Lenses.

We will continue to send prayers and good thoughts for the both of you. I don't need to remind you that you sure aren't alone in this because the VR.COM family is always there. He is also with you even if sometimes it looks like you only see one set of footprints in the sand.

May God Bless You Both,

Danny