K
Karlynn
I know most people would say "Easy for me to say" since I carried both of my children, but 1 of my 2 pregnancies that resulted in children (I had one mis) really sucked. It was when all my valve problems started. I'd do it over again to have the wonderful daughter I have, but if someone had come to me and said - we can give you this exact same child, but you don't have to be pregnant, I'd take them up on it. I can't say I really loved being pregnant. It was what I had to do to be what I wanted most to be - a Mom.
One of my many thoughts after giving birth to my son (our first child) was about how unconnected he was to the last nine months. I loved him because I had prepared for him for 9 months (or more) and had anticipated his arrival all that time. The big belly and the hemmorhoids etc, didn't really connect to this wonderful baby - for me. I'm sure some women are different. So one of my thoughts was "I now understand why adoptive parents say they don't love their adoptive children any differently or less." I think it's the preparation and anticipation that makes that connection, and you are defininately doing all sorts of preparing and anticipating.
My biggest thought was "Wow - this is how much my parents love me!" I told my children many times that they wouldn't know how much I love them until they had children of their own. Last Mother's Day (the first one after the arrival of my Avatar
) my son said "Mom - you're right. I never knew just how much you loved me until the day Avery was born."
I'm so thrilled for you and wish you many of God's blessings (such as the friendship you are developing with your surrogate) as you go through this process of being a parent. It's a process different from how I became a parent - but the "how" of the process isn't nearly as important as the "why" of the process. Your "why" is because you are going to be a terrific Mom.
One of my many thoughts after giving birth to my son (our first child) was about how unconnected he was to the last nine months. I loved him because I had prepared for him for 9 months (or more) and had anticipated his arrival all that time. The big belly and the hemmorhoids etc, didn't really connect to this wonderful baby - for me. I'm sure some women are different. So one of my thoughts was "I now understand why adoptive parents say they don't love their adoptive children any differently or less." I think it's the preparation and anticipation that makes that connection, and you are defininately doing all sorts of preparing and anticipating.
My biggest thought was "Wow - this is how much my parents love me!" I told my children many times that they wouldn't know how much I love them until they had children of their own. Last Mother's Day (the first one after the arrival of my Avatar
) my son said "Mom - you're right. I never knew just how much you loved me until the day Avery was born."I'm so thrilled for you and wish you many of God's blessings (such as the friendship you are developing with your surrogate) as you go through this process of being a parent. It's a process different from how I became a parent - but the "how" of the process isn't nearly as important as the "why" of the process. Your "why" is because you are going to be a terrific Mom.
