Wife has broken my heart

[hensylee]

After 24+ yrs my wife has stepped out and had an affair, said she hates me, won't try therapy ( I AM IN TWICE A WEEK ) to keep my sanity and as many of you know my sobriety of 15+ yrs.

So I'm heart broken and sad. Pray for me.

Adam

Oh no - I am so sorry to hear this. went through the same thing after 30 yrs. It certainly makes you suffer and cry. just hang on, it's going to take you awhile to get past it (some yrs) but gradually your sanity will come back. right now that is ALL that's on your mind. you will be tempted to ease the pain with anything you can (like booze, pills) so be very careful. Find someone you can talk to at any time of the day or night and when you feel very weak, call that person. talk, talk, talk to someone who will listen and be sympathetic. I am sooooooo sorry for you right now. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

I asked that we go to a counselor, too, but my ex said he was just fine; but I should go by myself. I didn't. it was all so cruel. Faith, Adam, FAITH that you will get to another spot more comfortable.

 

[rckrzy1]

Update

Update

Well somehow God has granted us some serenity and with alot of crying and soul searching we are going to try and recover our marriage and start over.

It will be a hard uphill battle at times but after all these years I am not throwing in the towel 5 minutes before the miracle.

So just maybe we can work this out. And I must admit I have not been the easiest guy to be with and can be an arse ( Ross can attest to that )

Again thanks for all your support and prayers .

 

[Lily]

I am so glad to read this! Best wishes to you both, together.

 

[njean]

Very glad to hear this Adam. I hope that you & your wife are able to put all this behind you & start out with a clean slate.

Best wishes to the both of you!

 

[hensylee]

I am really glad to hear this. don't waste your years. over all this time you have built a life together with so much involved. staying together would be in her best interests, too. she will never find another you. you will never find another her, either. one thing you must do if you remain together is to dump this affair totally/completely. if you don't it will come back and slap you in the face. usually when someone has an affair, there is a reason found at home. think about what it might be (both of you) and fix it. Go with God, Adam. YOU CAN DO IT if you really, really try. Thinking and praying for your whole miracle. Blessins......

 

[catwoman]

Adam:

Glad to hear this.

Hope the two of you will seek professional counseling and find one whom both of you can relate to. Finding reasons for problems in a marriage and how to work through those and resolve those in the future will help enormously.

Good luck.

 

[hall]

Good to hear this Adam. Hope and pray this works for you.

 

[rckrzy1]

Well now to top it off my cardio , now my wifes found blockage. She has been SOB , chest pain but the left arm numb got her into the doc ASAP. So now my wife needs a cath and stents are what ever. Man when it rains it pours.

 

[Dina]

one thing you must do if you remain together is to dump this affair totally/completely. if you don't it will come back and slap you in the face.

Forgiving and forgetting is definitely the name of this game,Ann is right.
I wish you all the best and hope that her cath goes well, and its only a little
sprinkle of rain,so the sun may shine again.

 

[Ross]

Woohoo! I'm glad to hear of the pulling it together thing. Yes it will be hard, but not entirely impossible.

As for the rest of the goings on, I understand where your coming from and your right, when it rains, it pours. Sorry it's happening to you also.

By the way, I don't think your an arse. Like I told you when you came back, forget yesterday, lets forget it and move forward. I meant it.

 

[Bina]

Adam, all the best to your wife on getting the blockage corrected.

 

[rckrzy1]

Woohoo! I'm glad to hear of the pulling it together thing. Yes it will be hard, but not entirely impossible.

As for the rest of the goings on, I understand where your coming from and your right, when it rains, it pours. Sorry it's happening to you also.

By the way, I don't think your an arse. Like I told you when you came back, forget yesterday, lets forget it and move forward. I meant it.

And I appreciate it. I just had to man up and admit I was wrong. And I'm so glad I have my support group back here. You have a thankless roles here at times Ross, so Thank You in case no one else did today.

 

[Lily]

Well now to top it off my cardio , now my wifes found blockage. She has been SOB , chest pain but the left arm numb got her into the doc ASAP. So now my wife needs a cath and stents are what ever. Man when it rains it pours.

This reminded me, Adam, I recall reading before, somewhere, that some women can have some type of hormone-induced artery restriction, even bringing on a heart attack. Sometimes that will cause a blockage but it can come and go and be difficult to detect.

I hope your wife will be fine and I'm glad you two have each other for love and support through this difficult time.

 

[ShezaGirlie]

I just had to man up and admit I was wrong.

Awwwww, now Adam you've gone and done it..! The one thing that makes us girlies' knees buckle and our hearts melt.

Best wishes for your wife with her recent health concerns and we'll be thinking of both of you.

 

[Cris N]

Best wishes to both of you in resolving the health and relationship issues troubling you.

 

[Wise]

Glad to hear about your new beginning. We all need one, in some way, every now and then.

 

[Superbob]

New beginnings, I agree, that's a big part of life -- pulling for you and your wife, Adam, as you deal with the challenges.

 

[Ross]

Glad to hear about your new beginning. We all need one, in some way, every now and then.

Boy isn't that the truth!

 

[rckrzy1]

Well wife going in for a color CT today. I guess they are trying to see how bad the blockages are. And BTW the wife has moved back into my bedroom so we seem to be making steps in the right direction. But her SOB has been so that we can't really kiss as she can't hold her breathe, kinda scary.

 

[escargome]

I will keep your wife in my prayers throught today and until I learn from you that she is on the road to recovery. I also pray that you and she are able to work break down those walls that got built between you. I've been married for 34 years come January and I can honestly say that it hasn't always been a party. Keep us posted on your wifes CT Scan results.