Wasn't expecting to be back here!

[Cheriejolay]

My first reaction was similar to yours, except there were a few tears, as well.

At this point, I basically, feel NO confidence that it's going to happen. Tomorrow, will be two weeks, since my ORIGINAL "fast track" surgery date.

Just being "real".

Thank God, though, that we DID have such an awesome turnout to our fundraiser, because, my husband is "allowed" 30 days, to be off work (UNPAID, because it's a new job), and every day that it's delayed, cuts me short, at the END of my disability period, even more than I already was........and the clock is ticking.

We trust that He will provide, and so far, He has. Just gotta hold on! My older son, Alex, told me this morning "Mom, I can't imagine how you are feeling, but for me, this is the adventure in faith, where now I can just see what God DOES have planned. AND, that Dr has precious cargo, so to speak, and I want him to be at his best". Sweet words, from my sweet son.

xxooCherie

 

[iheart]

Cherie,

Best of luck to you!! Sorry you keep getting bumped : (
Ron

 

[Jkm7]

My heart aches for the stress the wait is putting on you but you are likely saving a life because of the delays for your own surgery.

My first OHS was emergent and I did not understand that because I was so ill in CICU when I finally recovered enough to be strong enough for surgery, I bumped someone who had been scheduled. It wasn't until later I realized that and it lingered in my mind a long time.

But had I not had that surgery slot opened for my surgeon to take care of me, I likely would have died.

Hopefully that gives you some comfort to know someone needs him a tiny bit more.
When it came time for my second OHS, I was sure I would 'pay it forward' and be bumped for someone else but that did not happen and I am immensely grateful for that.

ALL the best wishes you go tomorrow and can get on with your recovery.
Have a safe surgery and bump free recovery.

 

[Cheriejolay]

Yes, I do realize, intellectually, that they are not bumping me for no reason.

I've worked in medicine, long enough to know that there are emergencies, and these things happen. Especially, when you're talking about cardiac surgeons.......those are "life or death" circumstances.

I'm grateful that I am NOT an emergency.......it's just hard to stay "positive" and "psyched", when you experience delay, after delay.

I am literally, sitting on my couch, KNOWING that I should, or could, be doing something productive, but after spending all day yesterday, scrambling around, getting things organized, etc, only to receive a call that I was NOT going (AGAIN).......it just knocked the wind out of my sails.

I'll get over it, and I know that my turn will come, and won't be at the expense of someone's situation. Thank you for the encouragement and gentle reminders. As I said, in an earlier post, I'm just being "real" about my feelings, because I feel like I can't really do that with anyone else (except my husband, and I think he almost feels worse for me, than I do, and I don't want to keep "burdening" him).

Also, it's extremely hard on my kids, and my parents.......we hugged and said "good-byes" yesterday, before my mom took my younger son home with her, and he was upset (trying really hard not to show it, because he's 13, and it's not "cool") and my mom, who is a breast cancer survivor, and leads a support group for breast cancer patients, "lost" one of her ladies today, and she's pretty emotional now, too.

It's just the cumulative effect from everything.......this, too, shall pass.

On a positive note: my Mayo cardiologist and my local cardiologist, are both being super supportive, via emails and texts, (as well as this forum), and all our other friends and family.

I'm looking forward to being back on here, AFTER, to let you all know how well I'm doing! =)

xxooCherie

 

[kfay]

Cherie, I'm so sorry you've had all these ups and downs. I'm assuming that you haven't received a phone call today, so tomorrow must be a go. I hope you are able to have a peaceful nights sleep and wake up ready to go and "git 'er dun" as we say in the south. I'll be thinking of you tomorrow and checking your caringbridge page often for updates. Do well my friend and we all look forward to hearing from you again.

Kim

 

[njean]

I just finished reading your posts and all I can say is, wow! What a rollercoaster this has been for you!

I pray that tomorrow is finally your day...no more delays, no more stress, just get it done and overwith! I send my prayers and thoughts for a most successful surgery!

Godspeed!

 

[kfay]

Here's the update from Cherie's husband after her surgery yesterday:

This has been a long day to say the least. However, we reached the other side of it and after talking with the surgeon, everything went very well. It did take a little longer because of previous surgery "things" and they did start a little late, which we didn't know. Alex and I got to go see her in the ICU (I'm not sure if she will remember us being there or not) which was nice after all these hours. She was still heavily sedated but we held her hand and talked to her. I know she was happy knowing he was going to be here with her. She will remain in ICU for the next two days or so. They will try and remove the breathing tube later tonight. It still remains to be seen if she will need a pacemaker. They should know within the next few days though.

Alex was able to spend a good part of the day with me. We had a nice lunch, lots of talking time, went into the prayer room, and of course, waited forever together!

I know this is a brief update, but I don't think there is anything else I can add for tonight.

Thanks everyone for all the prayers and continued prayers for healing. I know all you prayer warriors made a difference, as always!

Thanks, Scott

 

[Duffey]

Thanks Kim, for posting the update. I hope and pray her recovery is all smooth sailing.

 

[Superbob]

I am saying my prayers for Cherie and her family. Hoping for a smooth recovery and lots of success and happiness thereafter.

 

[Jkm7]

Sounding like good news so far.
I'm so happy for her Cherie and her family she finally had her surgery, it seems to have gone well and she can get on with healing.
All best wishes to them.

 

[njean]

Just checked into Cherie's CaringBridge page....nothing in there from today, so I guess, no news is good news. I hope she is progressing well!

 

[kfay]

Today's post from Scott. Sounds like things are headed in a good direction. Hope she gets her pain under control today.

Last night before I left the hospital, they removed Cherie's breathing tube and she had a pretty good night. She also had a great nurse with her which was comforting.

Today has been a rough day. Trying to get the pain under control so she is comfortable and yet still able to do what she needs to move forward in her recovery. This morning the surgeon came in and he himself made sure the staff knew that he "did a lot more to her than normal", emphasizing the need for more pain control. So hopefully tomorrow will be a better day for her. Cherie is pretty tough and can tolerate a lot of pain, and has over the years. So if she is complaining, there's usually something to it.

I came back home early to get Sam. I haven't seen him for a few days as he's been with Grandma and Grandpa. Thought it would be a nice break for them also.

I want to thank everyone again for continued prayers and also for the cards and letters that have been coming in the mail. I cannot say thank you enough.

Thanks,

Scott

 

[njean]

Sounds like everything is progressing pretty normally. I hope they are able to manage her pain better....that will help her rest more which is so important plus boost up her spirits.

Take time for yourself too and keeping Cherie in my prayers!

P.S. Thank you Kimmie for keeping us informed!

 

[kfay]

Today from Scott for those of you not checking her caringbridge page:

Today was a step forward for Cherie. She had her chest tubes removed, ALL FOUR OF THEM! I didn't know you could have that many at one time. She was then moved from one part of the ICU to what's called Progressive Care, which essentially is a step up from where she was. We walked "two laps" around the ICU wing. Walking is good, it starts getting you closer to the healing process. We will try and walk a little more each day. It's still hard for her to get up and down by herself so I'm glad I could stay with her all day and help her.

Cherie's Mom and Dad got to come see her today and Alex will be bringing Sam by tomorrow. Sam hasn't seen his Mom since Monday so he's looking forward to it.

Sorry for the late update but it was a long day and didn't home until late.

Continued prayers for the healing process and that all goes well.

Thank you,

Scott

 

[kfay]

Latest on Cherie. Unfortunately, looks like they had to open her back up. Hopefully, she will do better now and can start healing.

Just met with the surgeon and he said that she was bleeding inside which is why she was feeling so bad and why her blood pressure was so dangerously low. He got all of it out and even though there still is some risk, he feels confident that she will be OK. They obviously will be paying close attention to it. She will remain in the ICU probably through Monday so they can monitor things closely.

We got to go back and see her briefly, but since they don't want her waking up anytime soon, they are keeping her heavily sedated. We feel so bad that she had to be "opened back up" again and it's hard to see her like that again, but this was the only way it could be handled with so much at risk.

Thanks everyone for staying up late with me and praying. I'm trying to keep everyone in the loop and I think it helps me too.

 

[njean]

So sorry to hear of Cherie's latest setback! As Kimmie said, I hope that by having stopped the internal bleeding, things will start progressing forward in a positive way.

Prayers going out to her and her family.

 

[Greg a]

I too have been looking at her CareingBridge site and am glad Scott can keep it up ...prayers and positive vibes continue

 

[carolinemc]

I was just lurking through the posts and will be praying for Cherie and family for her speedy recover. Not easy for one to go through surgery back to back when things crop up. I will be praying for her and family. Hugs for her and family today.

 

[kfay]

Latest from today:

We're here back in the ICU. Cherie is resting all though she has sat up twice for brief moments. Breathing tube is out but still has chest tubes in along with other things. They will be keeping her in here at least through tomorrow so they can keep a close eye on things. There still is the risk of bleeding but as long as she is in here it will be easier to catch.

Last night was a scary, serious scene. Lots of people scurrying about being all serious, but calm. It was clear things weren't right and they knew it and I could hear it in their voices. The fact that her blood pressure not only dropped but they couldn't get it to come back up was worrying them as well as myself. Not an experience I'd recommend going through if you don't have too!

Thank you everyone for all the extra special prayers. It's comforting to read them.

Thanks,

Scott

 

[Greg a]

WOW Kimmie yoouu are quick LOL