Wasn't expecting to be back here!

[Cheriejolay]

Thank you, Greg, for posting the CaringBridge updates.

I am getting my rear end kicked. A three hour root canal, with crown, today, then back to lab for more lab work, because they are evidently, VERY concerned, that my blood count is low. I have to be checked for a source of blood loss, which I have to imagine, could change what the surgeons want to to with my AVR, since having a bleeding problem, and taking Coumadin, is probably not the best idea in the world.

Of course, at the lab, it took four additional sticks to get the blood they need. I have bruises everywhere (including from the heart cath "down there). It really doesn't seem to affect me, any more. The lab techs, and nurses, always apologize about having to stick me so much, but I just know it's coming, and there's nothing I can do about it, so I just sit there, and grin and bear it. I think I'm numb to it all, at this point (and half of my face is LITERALLY numb from the root canal!)

When I got out of the dentist chair today, they said, "good news". There is a cancellation for tomorrow, so now I am returning to dentist for another 3 hour procedure from noon to three. It's still not enough time to "clear" me for surgery this week.......things need to calm down a bit.

AND, now there's the "anemic" issue, so hopefully, we'll get some answers, but "scope" has already been mentioned, as in "colonoscopy" or "upper endoscopy" to rule out source of bleeding.

One day at a time, one day at a time.

My husband has been wonderful. He worked all this stuff out with getting my dental stuff done. I couldn't have done it, I was having a heart cath. He has coordinated stuff, and "shielded" me from all the people who want to communicate with me (well meaning, and loving), but I just don't have the energy to interact with everyone. I'm sure that others on this board, can relate to how I'm feeling.

To be all READY for surgery, and then have the rug pulled out from under you. And, to think, that I'm going through all this other NOT FUN stuff, to get ready to do the BIG not fun thing, which is another open heart surgery.

This board is the place, where you can say how you really feel, because there are others who understand completely. I appreciate having this forum.

Thank you all.

We'll keep the CaringBridge updated, as best we can, but as I said before, I'm really the only one who gets on here (not my husband), but since Greg is sharing the posts, it's like I'm on here, anyway.

Thank you again. xxoo Cherie

 

[anutherbuddy]

So sorry you are having all this additional stress. We will be thinking about you.

 

[Lucky]

Keeping you in thoughts and prayers.

 

[socalhome]

Cherie, Will be praying for all of you in next few days. The stress of the dental issues and travel issues will soon subside and in a month you can "relax" at home

 

[Cheriejolay]

From the CaringBridge.
I figured I would just go ahead and post it while I can. My husband posted this on CaringBridge today. I may not be able to do it for awhile, but this way Greg a doesn't have to do it. Thanks, again Greg!

"The root canal was done yesterday as well as some crown work. That was three hours of fun. Also, she needed to get more lab work done as per her doctor so did that also.

Today, was another fun day today of being tortured for her. Spent three hours, again, in the chair at the Dentist office to continue the dental work. Which also meant getting six MORE shots in the mouth just to do the work. But it looks like that part of it might be over (this did NOT keep her from talking by the way)!

And just when we think there can't be anymore, she needs to go the hospital tomorrow to have an upper endoscopy (EGD) AND a colonoscopy to try and see if they can find out why she's anemic (if she's bleeding anywhere). So that will start off our day tomorrow.

As you can imagine, all of this has been exhausting for her, and this isn't even the MAIN EVENT yet!

Please continue to pray for us, and pray that no other issues will be indentified, and that they will be able to get the surgery scheduled soon, and start the process of healing.

Thanks to everyone, for all of their continued support. We read each, and every message, left for us on the CaringBridge, and they all mean so much to us.

P.S. It has come to our attention that some people are not on Facebook (what?! and may not be aware of this CaringBridge site. Please feel free to share the website with them, so they can see what's going on, if they're interested. Basically, it's just caringbridge.org and search for Cherie Layton."

 

[Greg a]

Glad to do it when needed....KEEP strong Cherie an know we are in your corner !!!

 

[Jkm7]

I have tried to get to Cherie Layton's caringbridge.org page and cannot.
I'll send good wishes here and hope things start to get easier for Cherie and her family.

 

[Cheriejolay]

This is Cherie (from CaringBridge

Today was an upper endoscopy and colonoscopy. All was "clear". No signs of bleeding, so it appears to be just my issue with not absorbing iron, etc.

So, they decided "Hey! She's here, and we've got a big 'ol IV in her neck, let's give her some iron". I was thinking 30 minutes......maybe. Nope. Six hours. But they worked it a bit, so it was more like four, in any event, I had to get a test dose, wait one hour (to see if I had any reaction), then gave me 1200 more milligrams of iron (100mg was in the test dose)

They considered giving blood, but they will probably just do that when I have my surgery.

My husband, being the sweet soul he is, went home, got me my Snuggie, my Kindle, and my headphones, and I actually just sat in a recliner, dozed some, read a bit, watched a little Netflix, and got to visit with some of my friends (you know who you are).

It's so awkward, in the hospital, because when you work there, you try REALLY hard not to SEE people, because you know, privacy, and HIPPA laws, etc. But, in this case, I was free to yell out people's names as they passed by =) So then, they could talk to me.

So, we're clear on dental, we're clear on no bleeding, now we just need a surgical date.

And, that's pretty much all that happened today. Another FULL day of fun, and even though I spent most if lying down and/or reclining, I'm still tired.

We'll post again when something happens.......don't know when that will be. Hopefully, soon.

 

[socalhome]

Cherie, So glad that today went well! And your sense of humor is intact! Hope you all can rest up next few days.

 

[Greg a]

TODAY on CaringBridge and FB

https://www.facebook.com/events/537396716283027/

 

[Cheriejolay]

I've mentioned the support that we have, and they have really outdone themselves this time!

Because of numerous crisis' in our family, since Jan, 2009, we have taken numerous hits, medically, financially, etc, and were forced to file bankruptcy and lost the house that my Dad built for us (right after our 13 year old son was born). It was particularly difficult, because my parents lived on the same road, and they have to drive by "our" house every day.

We are so thankful that we WERE there, during those years of Sam growing up, and they were a great help to us, and they LOVED having their "newest" grandson, so close by.

Having said that, they/we were so blessed that we were able to find a lovely home to rent, in a beautiful place, between Sacramento and South Lake Tahoe.....the foothills of the Sierra Nevada mountains. Rich soil, many vineyards, orchards, Christmas tree farms......just lovely. AND, the landlords, after having met us, didn't hesitate to "accept" our application, even though we knew we had filed bankruptcy, and I had recently had OHS.

With my husband being forced out of his position (over 20 years), when the biggest funeral corporation in the world bought out the "family-owned" business, we suspected that it was only a matter of time before they found a way to let him go, and they did. So, went from two decent incomes, to basically mine, and then got hit with the whole OHS thing. We hung in there, as long as we could, but eventually had to "give it up". I'll tell you, that first month that I didn't make the house payment, made me physically ill. They wouldn't even talk to me, about possibly "working things out" because "obviously, you're making your house payments, so it doesn't appear to be a problem". Our attorney said, they will only start talking, if we miss payments.

All of this was happening around the time I went to Mayo Clinic in December, 2010, so you can imagine the stress of that FIRST surgery, and knowing that when we returned, we had to find a place to live, PLUS, endure the painful process of the whole bankruptcy thing.

Anyway, I say all that, to say this. We finally got debt free. No credit cards.....nothing. Everything was going well, and then wham, news of ANOTHER OHS coming up. I should also mention that my husband, while able to receive unemployment for quite a while.....it stopped. He has everything he needs to begin his own funeral business, and is well-beloved in the community we live in, and people are constantly asking for him, but..........he/ we don't have the capital to get it going. We don't know what we're doing.....we've never started a business before, but he has worked very hard to get (and maintain), all the licenses that he requires to have the business (even the business plan), but we need investors.

Due to being strapped financially, he had to take the only job that was offered to him........that of a security officer at an Indian Casino. Graveyard shift. The pay is barely above minimum wage, he rarely gets enough sleep, and he also coaches our son's basketball teams (school AND parks & rec). It's taken quite a toll on us, our marriage, AND on our son, who was used to having "Dad" around most of the time, and now, entering the teenage years, is when he needs "Dad" more than ever.

So, it's been a struggle, and then we got the news that my valve failed. So, there goes any potential money that we could have put towards him starting up his business.

Here's the GOOD NEWS. Our wonderful friends, and church family, have come together, and arranged a "fundraiser" for us. It's a little embarrassing, but still appreciated, and it's all coming together very quickly. I am constantly astounded at the love and support that we are shown, on FB, through CaringBridge, and through this forum.

We still don't know the actual surgery date..........the Dr is gone next week, but I'm already off work, due to the original plan, and there's no way I could've worked, with all the procedures I had last week. I believe they will have me come down to hospital next week, for the remainder of pre-op interviews, etc, and then they'll try to "work me in", beginning the 18th. I was SO disappointed that it didn't all work out, the way it was planned, but there's a reason for everything, and had I gone ahead and had surgery, being so anemic, and with an active infection in my mouth.....well, it could've turned out very badly.

I'm not sharing all of this to make you feel sorry for me/us. I'm sharing it, because there are still GOOD, loving people in this world, who don't hesitate to give a helping hand, when one is needed. My husband and I are so touched by this gesture, and just feel so "lifted up".

They already have the fundraiser arranged for next Sunday the 17th, and are optimistic as to what they can raise. BTW, my parents are awesome, and not without resources, but they have already paid for my root canal, etc, and I don't want them to deplete their "golden years" money on their adult daughter.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is, if people want to help you, let them. You're not a "loser" (as I thought), if I can't make this on my own. It gives others joy to be able to help you, as I know that it would give me joy (and HAS given me joy) to help others. We don't have to suffer this journey alone, so if anyone else out there, feels the same hesitancy, reluctance, and/or embarrassment? Don't. Accept the gift of love that others want to give you, and do it graciously.

It's no different than us, on this board, sharing our experiences, and accepting the encouragement, love and support.

I am overwhelmed with gratitude right now.......with the goodness that still exists in this world, even though we are bombarded daily, with negative things.

As soon as I know when my surgery is actually happening, I will let you know, and my CaringBridge will be updated, as consistently as possible.

Thank you, friends, that I don't know, and may never know. Thank you to my local friends and family who are always there for me. We will get through this, and my hope and prayer, for all of you, is that you embrace the gestures of love and support you receive, from whatever source.

Hugs to you all, Cherie

 

[Cheriejolay]

CaringBridge update 3/13/13

Getting Closer & a bit About Sam

This Friday afternoon, I am to have my pre-op meeting at Mercy General, then, as already stated previously, surgery is set for Monday.

Last week, was full of daily pokes and prods, but, somehow, this week feels "worse". This week is "waiting".

Waiting.



We're dealing with a lot of emotions right now. The shock has worn off (of having to do it, again), but today, Sam (my 13 year old) said something that really struck me. He doesn't say much about stuff, and even though, they know, at school, that this is going on, he isn't much for talking about it.

I've asked him, if he has questions, and he's had some. I've asked him if he's scared, and he is "a little", because now he knows "what could happen".

Today, though, when I asked how he was doing, he said he's actually "kinda mad". "Mad?", I said.

Sam: "Yes. Why didn't the first time work? Why do you have to have this again? It doesn't seem fair".

I told him I was "kinda mad", too, at first, but these things happen, and there are no guarantees. At Jr High church youth group last night, they talked about this very subject (why does God let bad things happen), but I guess he didn't bring it up, in the discussion. (As I said, he's not much for talking about feelings).

He DOES see how the path his brother, Alex, took, while painful, has turned into a way to help other people, but I just don't think he's making a connection like that with MY thing.

We talked, as we often do, about the fact that we don't know what the "Big Plan" is. We only see a tiny portion of it. God uses all things for good, and so, even if we can't see it now, someday we will.

I'll tell you what I see RIGHT NOW. I see a group of friends and family who are showing love to us, in the most incredible ways.

Sam & Scott got to go to a Kings game. The next night, Sam got to go to a Christian concert.

Sam has a great group of leaders and supporters within different youth groups at our church.

Our dear friends are giving us a fundraiser, to help us through this difficult time.....and we appreciate each and every one of you.

So, if you ask Sam "How's your Mom doing?", he'll probably just say "fine", but when you show him love & support, even with just "hanging out", it helps him. It helps us. Thank you.

P.S. He's also a little peeved that his picture isn't on the fundraiser flyer ("Hey, I'm a LAYTON, too!), but he'll get over it. Besides, I blamed it on Kristen

 

[kimcdougc]

Cherie, I am pretty new to this sight. I do pray that God gives you the peace that surpasses all understanding. I to am spending lots of time in the dental chair myself. Bridge today (3 1/2 hours) and a root canal Monday. I am in the process of picking a dr for my first ops to put in a new aortic valve. Then scheduling a date to do the surgery. You give me much courage and hope through your posts. Keep your chin up and I hope all goes well for a Monday surgery. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[Cheriejolay]

kimcdougc Everyone kept telling me (including my cardiologist, etc) "Oh, the dental clearance is nothing. It won't hold you up". Welp, it did. Part of the problem was that they were trying to "fast track" the surgery, and so, basically, ANY little glitch, and the plan would fall apart.....which it did. So, then I was rescheduled for Monday the 18th for surgery, then found out yesterday, that my case is bumped to Tuesday the 19th, which I know doesn't sound like a big deal, but when you've already been delayed, and you just want it BEHIND you, it's hard to hear. Also, they could STILL bump my case again, because they are running short the first couple days of the week ("two surgeons for two hospitals"), and I would probably have been fine with the waiting, had I known.

They basically put me OFF WORK on March 1st because that's the first day I was missing work, and was supposed to have my surgeon's visit (done), then Monday following was dental clearance, heart cath, ct chest, Tuesday, Pre-op at hospital, Wednesday (the 6th) surgery, but it all went kaput with the dental appt.

So, I had to have a bunch of other things done, and now.......waiting. Best wishes with all the dental stuff (wasn't as bad as I thought it would be), and best of luck to you with your surgery. God Bless.

Here's my most recent excerpt from our CaringBridge site

Pre-op Visit
Written 11 hours ago

Well, that was unlike any other "pre-op" visit I've ever had. I'll spare you the details (some of you, I'll spare the details......some of you, I already SPEWED the details.......sorry, Stan)

We were there from 2pm until after 6pm, and virtually, all that time I was getting blood drawn (she got it, first try!), xrays, ABG's (not fun), meeting with anesthesia, and re-hashing my lengthy medical history with the pre-op RN.
(I can't even count the number of times, I've answered the SAME questions)

Near the end, Dr. Sharma's cardiac nurse coordinator came in the room, and broke the news that I have been "bumped" from Monday the 18th. Not gonna lie........tears welled up, a bit. I just want it to BE DONE. She said the Dr wasn't thrilled either, but things happen, and there are patients who need to be done before me (e.g. they are in the hospital WAITING for surgery now).

So, the new date is Tuesday the 19th. Have to be there at 0500. BUT, that could still change, if an emergency arises, so I just have to be "okay" with it. It turns out, that when we shared what our friends and family are doing for us (the fundraiser), and about our church family, she shared her faith with us, and reminded me that it is in God's hands, and remember to "trust". We hugged, at the end. She was great.

On a side note, when we got there, people kept referring to "the flood" that had displaced some of the departments, but we didn't know if they meant that they were flooded with patients or actually flooded. Then, I started looking for locusts, etc, but it turns out, it was a water pipe, and has nothing to do with the area where my surgery will be.

Because my surgery is a "re-do", they have to go very slowly through the scar tissue, etc, being very careful, and that's why it is estimated to take about two hours (per the surgeon) to even get to the heart, so the overall surgery will be about six hours.

Then, I will go to the cardiac surgery ICU for, likely, two days, then the "progressive care unit" from day three until discharge, estimated to be overall 5 to 8 total days, from start to finish.

They said as long as I was feeling up to it, didn't "lip-lock" anybody, and wore a mask, that I could come to the fundraiser Sunday.(I forgot to grab a couple of those yellow masks......could one of my hospital friends grab a few?)

So, that's the latest. It's hard not to focus on the delays, and anxiety, but when I heard what some other patients have gone through......this is nothing. (Well, not NOTHING, but it could be way worse).

All of the staff at the hospital spoke very highly of Dr. Sharma, and I know from personal experience, if you work at a hospital, and you don't like a doctor, you just keep your lip zipped, so that meant a lot. They said he's "even nice to the staff". Now, THAT's a good doctor

Not sure if we'll post anything else, til surgery.......maybe something after the fundraiser.

Scott will keep up on the CaringBridge, when I am unable to.

As always, thank you for your support and prayers.
xxoo Cherie & Scott

 

[Duffey]

I'm keeping you in my prayers for the 19th and beyond, Cherie. Godspeed!

 

[Roberta]

Please add me to your thoughts and prayers as well! Best wishes to you...

 

[Cheriejolay]

Thank you, to everyone!

 

[Cheriejolay]

Okay, today, last day before surgery.....the nerves are really kicking in, now! BUT, we are riding high, after a wonderful fundraiser done for us, yesterday, that was more successful, than any of us could have imagined. Gives me peace, that I don't have finances to worry about, as well!

This will likely be the last post here, by me, but my husband will be updating my CaringBridge. Thank you, friends, for your prayers and support!

Speechless

Written 13 hours ago

But, I'm going to "speak" anyway.


Today was the fundraiser, that my friends and family organized for me. After talking with others, (and another conversation with the pre-op RN at Mercy), we decided that it would be better, if I stayed home, instead of risk catching ANYTHING that could possibly delay my surgery.


Just a little wary, because it's been postponed several times now, & I just need it to be done.

When the fundraiser started, I began getting text messages, with pictures, some videos, and Facebook posts. I was SHOCKED at the number of people who were there.

The time and effort, that everyone put in, to do this for us, is astounding. I don't even have the final tally yet, of what they made, and right now, that doesn't even matter to us the most.

What matters is the love that has been shown to me, and my family. The words of encouragement, and the prayers shared with me, (sometimes from unexpected places!)

I got to be "there" via Facetime, for a little bit, and other than seeing up Jaryck and Josh's noses, from time to time , it was an amazing experience.


Scott just got home, and shared with me, his experience there. He couldn't talk to everybody (and felt bad about that), but there were just so many people!


We are sitting together, at the dining room table, reading the notes, and the cards, and in AWE of the generosity of our friends and family.

There's no way that we can thank each of you, individually, because some of you, donated anonymously, and we're so afraid of missing someone, so please accept this, as our heartfelt thanks for EVERYTHING!


As my friend, Kristen (the amazing organizer of this event) said "We don't want you to worry about money. We want you to get well".


Since all of you did your part, I promise to hold up MY end of the bargain. I'll be back in "fighting form" before you know it.


We are unbelievably blessed. Cherie & Scott, Alex, & Sam

 

[Cheriejolay]

Just got a call that I've been "bumped" again........now, it's happening Wednesday......supposedly.

Pretty mentally & emotionally exhausting. The waiting is brutal, but when you think it's ACTUALLY going to happen (it was 3:30 pm, when we go the call), we thought it was fairly certain that we would be at hospital at 5 tomorrow morning, and I just feel kind of numb right now.

Guess it'll happen when it's supposed to happen.

 

[escargome]

OK, my first reaction to this news is %$***@!!!!!! (boy am I gonna get in trouble for that language)
Anyway, come on Wednesday. Please, don't let that phone ring on Tuesday afternoon or night.
And God please cut Cherie some slack and help her and her family over this hurdle. :biggrin2: