Ross,
I am truly saddened to read this. I know what it is like to lose someone close, who has traveled many of the same roads you have.
A good way to think of things, I believe, is how a colleague at work sees it. He has had some rather serious health issues, and now lives every day as fully as he can, under the belief that he was supposed to die when he was in the hospital, but since he did not, every day is a gift from above, and his assignment is to live it to its fullest, and not to worry about what comes next.
Our prayers are with you, your family, Tbone and his family.