Emotionally, I could use some support. Thanks.

[dick0236]

have you thought about a TAVI and then valve in valve?

(sorry, couldn't help myself)

Seriously though, given how long its lasted, I would think that your wrecking ball will continue bashing around in there for quite some time.

Yeah, but not for very long.

One of my docs told me a few years ago that valve failure probably would not be my eventual downfall......there's a lot of other stuff that comes with age that'll take of that.

 

[Agian]

Sure, we've all got to die of something. But 80 isn't as old as it used to be. Being a Freemason, I know heaps of healthy 90-somethings. Their forgetfulness is part of the entertainment. But they live happy, productive lives.

 

[pellicle]

Yeah, but not for very long.

yeah ... can't imagine them pulling the ball out via the catheter ;-)

When they dug the tunnel in Brisbane (queensland) they buried the digging machine in a side tunnel ... somehow that thought occured to me when wondering how they'd remove the ball and cage in a TAVI... http://www.gizmodo.com.au/2015/02/r...chine-from-the-ground-is-strangely-difficult/

One of my docs told me a few years ago that valve failure probably would not be my eventual downfall......there's a lot of other stuff that comes with age that'll take of that.

my Dr told me that motorcycle riding would kill me before my valve did ... he could be right

 

[Paleowoman]

Maybe we're a select minority. I notice a lot of people come here pre-op, have their surgery and then we never see them again.... And that's ok.

That could easily be the nature of forums (fora) these days, and because that's the way a lot of people are with forums unfortunately. They have a problem, an issue, they join a forum for advice, they then leave soon after. They don't stick around to offer support to others who come along in the same boat. I notice this on both the osteoporosis forum and diabetes forum I'm on, as well as with a forum for English having a house in France that I'm on !

So, yes, we're a select minority !

 

[Agian]

What, there's a forum for English people that own houses in France? LMAO

Have you considered offering Pellicle honorary membership?

 

[cldlhd]

This is a great thread. As a old male and taught to live a "big boys don't cry" life, the emotional part of living after surgery has been, at times, very difficult. Modern medicine can fix just about anything but it falls woefully short in dealing with post-op issues that can't be fixed with a scalpel. I have read threads, like this one, that have helped me "come to grips" with what has been dealt me. Don't be afraid of the "occasional break downs".........but don't stay there.

Well said. As a fellow male I can relate to Dicks post. I had a few little and medium breakdowns. When I got my diagnosis I thought it was basically a death sentence. That first day when picked up my 7 yr old from school it was hard to control it , especially since it was 2 months after my dad died of heart issues. I couldn't hold it in the day we dropped him at school in the way to the hospital. But as the man said don't stay there because that's not helpful and there is a fix.

 

[Paleowoman]

What, there's a forum for English people that own houses in France? LMAO

Yes - here: http://the-languedoc-page.com/phpBB3/ Lots of Brits own property in France (and Spain) You don't know how bad the weather is in the UK, we need to get away to a bit of sun!!! And property is dirt cheap in France (and Spain).

 

[pellicle]

...Have you considered offering Pellicle honorary membership?

Hey, steady on mate ... I live in Finland, not France.

 

[Agian]

Hey, steady on mate ... I live in Finland, not France.

You missed the point. The idea of you being on a forum of English people talking about the real estate in France would be a recipe for comedy.

 

[DachsieMom]

I think many (me included) don't post much after surgery, but do review the postings each day. Honestly, by the time I look at it after a long day, I scan the posts quickly - and tell myself I want to log in to reply to something the next day - and then forget! I try to post when I can, as I might be able to add insight for fellow younger females having surgery. It is a fabulous forum and I will be forever greatful for the advice I received.

 

[Agian]

The collective wisdom on this forum probably trumps most of the bullshit I've heard come out of the mouths of so-called experts.

I've said this before, dealt with many different specialists. Cardiologists, on the other hand? Generally unimpressed. Who set them as the gate-keepers of when people need operations anyway? I'd much rather deal with the surgeon(s) who at least know what they're talking about. Some people don't know a lot, but don't want others to cotton on to them, so they put on this air of pomposity. In real life, most of these dickheads would get bashed in any Australian pub.

 

[pellicle]

I've said this before, dealt with many different specialists. Cardiologists, on the other hand? Generally unimpressed..... Some people don't know a lot, but don't want others to cotton on to them, so they put on this air of pomposity. In real life, most of these dickheads would get bashed in any Australian pub.

I reckon that's why they don't go to pubs ... maybe "the lounge bar"

 

[Agian]

I reckon that's why they don't go to pubs ... maybe "the lounge bar"

Sipping lattes at the local wankfest.

 

[epstns]

Yeah, but not for very long.

One of my docs told me a few years ago that valve failure probably would not be my eventual downfall......there's a lot of other stuff that comes with age that'll take of that.

I hear you, Dick! I'm not quite your age, but I am aware of a few medical issues that could come to haunt me before I ever need a re-do of my valve. I think we all have really just traded a "problem" for a "condition." We used to have a bad valve. Now we have good valves, but we must continue to monitor them so that whenever they show signs of deterioration, we can assess the situation and probably go for another "fix." Kind of like owning an old car. We know that it won't be trouble-free, but as long as it is practical and safe to keep it running, we can continue to enjoy it.

 

[Mellyouttaphase]

Emotionally, I needed the most support when I was in the first days post-surgery realising that at 31 years old with a tissue valve I would definitely need a "re-do" in the future. Just the thought sent me into a panic spiral. I just could not face the idea of going through all of that again. Ever. This fear has since subsided into the category of resignation - "it is what it is" - but even more of a push to enjoy my life in the meantime. I think some of this reasoning is powering me through my recovery right now.

 

[epstns]

I think some of this reasoning is powering me through my recovery right now.

That's a good way to think of it. We all must find what helps us to cope and to get back to our lives most effectively. Keep thinking that way!

 

[Forrest]

Tigerlily,

Sorry to hear about the extra stress of late. This was a very good thread, full of insightful comments and experiences--thanks for sharing your original post.

Along the lines of worry, fear and the extra hurdles that come with heart problems, I can say that I vacillate from periods of carefree (damn the torpedos) to sadness and fear, to feeling like a strong survivor who's still a bit worried about the future. After being factual, accepting and strong for the first few weeks after I was told about my condition 7 years ago, I then fell to my knees and cried when I visited my Dad’s grave after my follow-up appointment when the doc went into more detail about how I would need open heart surgery soon. Knowing that my Dad died in his late 60’s just a few years earlier it brought out a lot of emotions, I thought what would he think of his boy who was always physically fit and rugged, but now needs his chest cracked open; would he be in as much disbelief as I was? I know everybody has different things they’re dealing with and have dealt with, some I can’t even fathom. So I can only speak of my experiences. I know I haven’t stopped living, that I’m stronger than I thought I was, but I know I can sometimes be my worse enemy too. At first I tended to analyze all the numbers (Echos) and read hundreds of articles. I needed to do that, and it’s a part of my personality to be well informed. But after a while it was like knowing that my condition could have 100 different paths, and yet it would only take one to kill me. I gradually started to listen to the cardiologist who after reading my annual echo would say “you’re doing okay, see you next time”. I’ve had 3 cardiologist since 2009 (they move or retire), the last one is more matter of fact, he still said “you’re okay, see you next year”, but he confirmed in more exacting tones that my other valve (mitral) will probably need addressing at the same time or sooner than when my tissue valve needs replacing...this future eventuality sent me into sadness again, about my future, like why can’t I lick this thing (wishful thinking). So it’s back to pretending I’m a courageous person, which my gal says I am. I like that phrase, “faking it until you make it”. What else can I do . Best wishes to you, you sound stronger than you think.

 

[David W]

Sending the Love from London

 

[epstns]

Hi, Forrest - And nice to "see" you back. I can readily identify with some of what you've said. When confronted with a new diagnosis, I too read incessantly, until I am saturated with information. I also can be my own worst enemy once I've read about all that is involved or could happen. We just have to work our way through the self-induced stress to be able to get back to life. Some people have an easy time of that, others like me do not. Eventually we manage, and can get on with things.

Unfortunately for me, I have a couple of medical conditions that follow such a path. Diagnosis, crash-dive into the date, and eventual acceptance and return to life. The bad factor for me is that they are not on the same time schedule. . .

 

[Forrest]

Steve E.,
Glad you made it through that hurdle with your pacemaker. It seems that heart issues sometimes keep throwing curve balls at us, and I like the observation that some folks dive into the diagnosis, learn what is needed, do what what they can, then accept and get back to living. I am always thankful that so far with me there has been a "get back to living"...as I know there’s always examples of how others in life haven’t been so fortunate.

Tigerlily, I hope you are doing well, your honest disclosure post opened up a lot of good discussion about the emotional side of things.