Do you hold back?

[Guest]

I'm not asking if you hold yourself back in terms of what you can accomplish.

Instead, either online or in person, do you hold back part of your personality or thoughts or views? In other words, do people experience the _complete_ you?


If you hold back ... why? Is your opinion not popular? Is a passion of yours "too weird"? Do you feel like an outcast ... or that you don't belong?


If you don't hold back ... have you always been this way ... or did you experience a change that made you decide to "throw caution to the wind" and let people see the complete you?


OR ... are you like me ... a mixture of the two, depending on the people and situation?



Cort:33swm."Mr Monte Carlo.Mr Road Trip".pig valve.pacemaker
WRMNshowcase.lego.HO.model.MCs.RT.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"There's so much I need to say to you" ... Phil Collins ... 'Take A Look At Me Now / Against All Odds'

 

[LUVMyBirman]

Would have to say....no holding back these days. In the past....would be more selective in my opinions. Passive, etc. Got stepped on a bunch.

As far as expressing myself.......life is too short to suppress

 

[geebee]

I definitely am a mixture. I do not really like conflict so I do everything I can to avoid it. It pains me to argue with someone. I still do argue sometimes when I feel strongly about something but, even on VR.com, I have chosen to stay away from some topics these days because the "fight" is useless. I guess you could say I pick my battles very carefully and I share myself selectively.

I have always been an introvert. I have chosen a few career paths that required me to be an extrovert so I can change my colors when I need to but I am a pretty private person and enjoy my solitude.

I would not make a good celebrity.

 

[Ross]

If I feel the other party is fishing, I'm not forthcoming. Other then that, what you see is what you get.

 

[WayneGM]

geebee took the words right out of my mouth. I couldn't have described myself better.

 

[Karlynn]

I'm a What-You-See-Is-What-You-Get, both in person and in my writing. I don't change my persona to fit the situation, but I, like most, am multi-faceted and sometimes it's hard to see all the facets.

If I were a celebrity, I'd be the one getting in trouble for being truthful in what I say without regard to how the public views me. I wouldn't be in-your-face, but when asked, there would be little filtering. And now might be the best time to tell you that I really am a celebrity. My name is Christy Brinkley and "Karlynn" is just my alias.

It would be interesting to see how my on-line acquaintances (that haven't met me in person) see me. My guess is that for some, it's pretty different than the reality. They see me as being way more nice than I really am , or way more ...... There are a few here who haven't met me in person that have me pegged! And you know who you are! But I'm pretty sure that they are just great judges of character in general.

 

[Cooker]

Believe it or not I hold back at times. I think we all do. If we did not someone would kill us. LOL. I would say that I am about 95% let her rip and 5 % of the time I hold back or weigh my words.

I am ashamed to say that when I do hold back it is not for the other persons sake but for mine. I do not want to spend a lot of time explaining or defending myself. I really am as crazy as most of you think so I guess no explination is really necessary

 

[Bina]

Ditto.....I'm pretty much out there as far as "what you see is what you get". People who meet me may find me kind of nuts or kind of quiet, depending on what is going on....I don't find any pleasure in fights and confrontations.
I'm a sagittarius; nothing too screwed up!!!
Bina
a.k.a. Heidi Klum

 

[Cooker]

I'm a sagittarius; nothing too screwed up!!!
Bina
a.k.a. Heidi Klum

Heidi!!! I knew that was you!!!

Tom the Taurus (no bull)

 

[Rich]

I hold back these days, not knowing someone in person makes it too easy to offend them.
Years ago prior to this forum we had our little e-mail group, with a lot of our current members. We 'talked' and joked as well
I responded jokingly to a message and ended up offending someone. She knows who she is and I'm sure she is a very good person. To this day I'm sorry for that, but it's a little late. So I tend to be careful and conservative these days.
Rich

 

[hensylee]

I hold back these days, not knowing someone in person makes it too easy to offend them.
Years ago prior to this forum we had our little e-mail group, with a lot of our current members. We 'talked' and joked as well
I responded jokingly to a message and ended up offending someone. She knows who she is and I'm sure she is a very good person. To this day I'm sorry for that, but it's a little late. So I tend to be careful and conservative these days.
Rich

Rich, I think that was just after I joined because I recall an argument going on that I didn't 'get'. Always wondered what was going on.

So, Cort, what about you?

 

[PeggyM]

What is holding back? I am wayyyyyy out there. I have always been very uh....expressive? LOL. Occasionaly the foot enteres the mouth but that's okay. You just yank it out and start over!

 

[Rich]

Ann,
It really wasn't an argument, just a little joking around that was taken the wrong way. That's why I'm a bit reluctant these days to join in some discussions. I'm not the kind of person that would purposely try and offend someone. I did apologize to the person I'm referring to, but that was the best I could do. Apparently that wasn't good enough.
Rich

 

[Guest]

So, Cort, what about you?

*grins*

Well, I suppose I should answer my own questions, in a bit more detail, huh, Ann?

As I eluded to in my original post, I'm a mixture. Course, it's interesting to find out if people see me the same way I see myself, in terms of this topic ... and in terms of being wanted and/or an outcast and/or not belonging.


I tend to "hold back" on the forums because I know thoughts/statements are taken too personally by others. I have also seen "flame wars" develop because people cannot fully understand the meaning of one's written words, since inflections and "tongue in cheek" statements are very hard to discern on the printed page.

Still, at times, I've NOT held back ENOUGH. Some of my thoughts/beliefs about certain things/companies are not highly regarded. And, when I get "riled up" about something ... I don't mince words. Believe it or not, as much as I've "ranted" sometimes, ya'll ain't seen nothing yet....

I also "hold back" on the forums in terms of some of my interests. Oh, you can see many of my interests on my website [radio show, Monte Carlos, collections, hobbies, road trips, etc.], but I have a few about which only a small number of people know.


In person, I do not "hold back" much ... especially after I have gotten to know people. In person, it is much easier to discern the inflections and "tongue in cheek" comments, so I am very open with friends/family. And most people who know me ... and have met me in person ... know most, if not all, there is to know about me, my personality, my wants, my interests, my hobbies, my strong dislikes, etc. I have found that the more you meet in person, the more you have in common with others ... and that can lead to a strong basis for knowing how someone will react to something ... and being able to discern different types of statements/posts.


I used to care a great deal whether people liked me or not. Over the years, that has lessened. Oh, I still care ... but, if people take my statements too seriously or too personally on the forums (or in person, for that matter) and/or don't want to meet me because of my statements/beliefs/etc. and/or don't comment much about my posts/threads, I've come to realize that that is not my issue, since my comments are sincere and honest ... and I'm not compromising my personality or values/beliefs.



Cort:33swm."Mr Monte Carlo.Mr Road Trip".pig valve.pacemaker
WRMNshowcase.lego.HO.model.MCs.RT.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"You have to try again" ... Janie Fricke ... 'You Don't Know Love'

 

[debster913]

Change after surgery

Change after surgery

As always, Cort, interesting thread!

I suppose I'm both. I have to be careful with what I say in the classroom or it'll bite me in the butt, but at the same time I have no problem telling my students what's what. At our English department meetings, although I have my own opinion about things, I keep my mouth shut or I'll get in trouble. My department is pretty divisive and we have cliques, so I try to stay out of the fray and just focus on doing right by the kids.

Lately, with my mom back in ICU and all of her emotional/psychological difficulties preventing her from progressing, I am no holds barred. I've been her advocate and have verbally kicked her in the butt to try to motivate her.

I'm pretty tactful, I'm a Virgo so I try to avoid conflict and if I am faced with a situation, I try to be diplomatic. Oh, and I did win "Most Sarcastic Teacher" among the seniors' poll for the last school newspaper issue. Heh.

Debi

 

[Guest]

As always, Cort, interesting thread!

*nods*

Thank you .

I'm pretty tactful, I'm a Virgo so I try to avoid conflict and if I am faced with a situation, I try to be diplomatic. Oh, and I did win "Most Sarcastic Teacher" among the seniors' poll for the last school newspaper issue. Heh.

Hmmm...I'm a Virgo, too. Interesting.

As for the "Most Sarcastic Teacher" ... I might be able to win for "Most Sarcastic" .



Cort:33swm."Mr Monte Carlo.Mr Road Trip".pig valve.pacemaker
WRMNshowcase.lego.HO.model.MCs.RT.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"I kept my heart hidden" ... Bryan White ... 'So Much For Pretending'

 

[MaryC]

As for the "Most Sarcastic Teacher" ... I might be able to win for "Most Sarcastic" .



Cort:33swm."Mr Monte Carlo.Mr Road Trip".pig valve.pacemaker
WRMNshowcase.lego.HO.model.MCs.RT.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"I kept my heart hidden" ... Bryan White ... 'So Much For Pretending'

Cort,
I have not picked up on you being sarcastic since I started getting on this site. You must be holding back your real self!

 

[Guest]

Cort,
I have not picked up on you being sarcastic since I started getting on this site. You must be holding back your real self!

*grins devilishly*

Oh ... it doesn't take much for my sarcasm to start rearing its sometimes ugly head ... just get me mad about somethin' . He he



Cort:33swm."Mr Monte Carlo.Mr Road Trip".pig valve.pacemaker
WRMNshowcase.lego.HO.model.MCs.RT.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"I will not make the same mistakes" ... Kelly Clarkson ... 'Because Of You'