M
Marge
> In the beginning, God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower and
> spinach, with green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man
> and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
>
> Then, using God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's and
> Krispy Kreme. And Satan said: "You want hot fudge with that?"
> And Man said: "Yes!"
> And Woman said: "I'll have one, too...with sprinkles."
> And 'lo they gained 10 pounds.
>
> And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure
> that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the
> wheat, and sugar from the cane, and combined them. And Woman went
> from size 8 to 14.
>
> So God said: "Try my fresh green garden salad."
> And Satan presented crumbled Bleu Cheese dressing and garlic toast on
> the side.
> And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
>
> God then said: "I have sent you heart-healthy vegetables and olive
> oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep-fried
> coconut shrimp, butter dipped lobster chunks, and chicken-fried steak
> so big it needed its own platter. And Man's cholesterol went through
> the roof.
>
> Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming
> with potassium and good nutrition. Then Satan peeled off the
> healthful skin, sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried
> them in animal fats adding copious quantities of salt. And Man packed
> on more pounds.
>
> God then brought forth running shoes so that his children might lose
> those extra pounds. And Satan introduced cable TV with remote control
> so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and
> Woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and started
> wearing stretchy Lycra jogging suits.
>
> God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and
> still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and the
> 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then Satan said: "You want fries with
> that?"
> And Man replied: "Yes! And super size 'em!"
> And Satan said: "It is good."
> And Man and Woman went into cardiac arrest.
>
> God sighed...and created quadruple by-pass surgery.
>
> Satan chuckled and created HMOs.
>
> spinach, with green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man
> and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
>
> Then, using God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's and
> Krispy Kreme. And Satan said: "You want hot fudge with that?"
> And Man said: "Yes!"
> And Woman said: "I'll have one, too...with sprinkles."
> And 'lo they gained 10 pounds.
>
> And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure
> that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the
> wheat, and sugar from the cane, and combined them. And Woman went
> from size 8 to 14.
>
> So God said: "Try my fresh green garden salad."
> And Satan presented crumbled Bleu Cheese dressing and garlic toast on
> the side.
> And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
>
> God then said: "I have sent you heart-healthy vegetables and olive
> oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep-fried
> coconut shrimp, butter dipped lobster chunks, and chicken-fried steak
> so big it needed its own platter. And Man's cholesterol went through
> the roof.
>
> Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming
> with potassium and good nutrition. Then Satan peeled off the
> healthful skin, sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried
> them in animal fats adding copious quantities of salt. And Man packed
> on more pounds.
>
> God then brought forth running shoes so that his children might lose
> those extra pounds. And Satan introduced cable TV with remote control
> so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and
> Woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and started
> wearing stretchy Lycra jogging suits.
>
> God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and
> still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and the
> 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then Satan said: "You want fries with
> that?"
> And Man replied: "Yes! And super size 'em!"
> And Satan said: "It is good."
> And Man and Woman went into cardiac arrest.
>
> God sighed...and created quadruple by-pass surgery.
>
> Satan chuckled and created HMOs.
>
