Ask for a cot.

[geebee]

Absolutely, Niki. Chris is the same as your husband. He gets me water, snacks and helps with repositioning ,etc. - all the things that take away from the time the nurses have to provide essential medical care.

I have been in and out of hospitals (as an adult with good memory) for almost 30 years. The available care has changed drastically during that time. There used to be many more volunteers and LPNs and nurses aides that did the "little things" that can be really important to the comfort and good recovery of the patient. The hospitals today are sadly understaffed and that is not the fault of the nurses. They have to make decisions constantly on what action is more important to a patient's survival.

We have to be responsible for our own care be it in or out of hospitals. I never feel that when Chris is there, I get less care. In fact, having him there can actually provide more care since he would know when the situation might change and require the intervention of the medical staff.

That being said, some of the things that happened to Joe and other patients in the ICU where the care is more one-on-one, are outrageous. A patient being left on the floor for some time in an ICU environment makes me furious.

 

[annb]

I know that we received amazing care at St Francis and all of the nurses were superb including the one who was there when Byron started spiking a fever. She just was not as familiar with him as some of the other nurses and the floor was very busy that day. My intent was not to rag on the nurses but to emphasize how quickly things can go south and if a family member is present it will be caught sooner. I have great respect for nurses and the techs that work with them. I changed Byron's sheets everyday so they would have time to help the "sicker" people. I brought him all of his ice and water and did whatever I could to relieve the tremendous burden that the hospital staff was under. St Francis is a very busy cardiac hospital and although very well staffed falls victim to short staff like everyone else on occasion. We had tremendous care there. We could not have asked for better. I just wanted people to know that even when all appears well hiccups occur quickly.

Thanks
Ann

 

[Lynlw]

When I said I 'caught" things that could have been problems, I certainly didn't mean yeah i got them doing something wrong, I meant I stopped them or tried to before they did something or didn't do something.. I don't think anyone here goes into a hospital stay w/ a chip in their shoulder rady to jump on any little thing. and really hope the stay goes well. and our relatives are taken proper care of, but yes you can be at the bedside and be very nice and helpful to the staff.and do small things to help, for the most part Justin's stays were like that.and the good nurses seem to like haveing family there to watch the patient, help with the patient and don't mind answerring questions about what they are doing or hanging, actually the good ones, usually tell you before they hang it. BUT there have also been awful stays with terrible care at leading centers. Justin last stay was unforgivable and as he told his PC, the vet treats our dogs better. we had to track down his meds an hour after he should have got them and it only went down hill from there. Did I go in to that hospital stay hoping that it would be like that, God no, but I hve wonderred how he would have made out IF his dad or I weren't with him 24 hours a day, IT was so bad, if he wasn't being DXD that day we were going to transfer him to a different hospital that was always properly staffed and he always got good care.
It was so bad I wrote letters to the floor Charge nurse, the CCU nurse, the head of cardiology and the pres of CHOP because of some of the things they did to Justin, kick him out of CCU, but not have a roon for him for hours 24 hours post op heart surgery, so kept him in a treatment room , BUT he could have his meds, because he didn't have a room so according to the computer he didn't exist. THAT one yep, I took care of. Oh my mom was a nurse and i worked in hospitals for 18 years as a lab tech.

 

[Susan BAV]

Niki - I think you make an excellent point.

Nothing against nurses specifically; I've seen many good ones -- capable and caring and eager to do their work with efficiency and cheer -- but I've seen too many of another kind also -- perhaps overworked or undervalued also.

Regarding being with family at a hospital - we've been there for reasons of moral support and for basic needs that require less buzzes (on the patient call buttons) for the nurses; and we have run and fetched nurses when they couldn't/wouldn't answer a buzz for whatever necessary reason. And I kept mental track of what med was given, when and why, in the case of my son's critical care issue.

But when my dad was being treated for his final illness in a VA hospital, he was put in a small ward way down at the end of a long empty and forgotten hallway. It was like what I would think of as a death ward and you hardly ever saw a nurse when you needed one. His roommates quickly disappeared from that dreary room to ICU and then they were gone. It was depressing for everyone.

My dad, who was still handsome and charming, was probably the most pleasant patient I could ever imagine; but sometimes he couldn't get a nurse or a pain pill or a suppository or anything for hours, with or without buzzing for a nurse. My mom and I were as pleasant as we could reasonably be but the man was in excruciating pain and frequently had to wait inexcusable extra hours for simple regularly scheduled pain meds or any simple or essential care. The nurses always had an excuse and there was no doubt some resented my mom and I being there and we occasionally had to be very direct in pursuing some care for him.

He had a feeding tube in his intestine and just attaching him to the machine and putting the liquid in the machine was a 12-14 hour repetitious all night event, which the nurses were supposed to do when he was in the hospital but we did when we took him home. We also took him from his hospital room by car to his daily radiation at another facility and his dual and simultaneous chemo clinics within the VA hospital and we took him home on weekends; I don't know how he would have gotten to any of those without our gentle care; but I'm sure it would have been even rougher on him.

His experience was probably not so much of a nursing issue as an administration issue. But it was a good example of how the patient can need a loving advocate.

 

[Nancy]

I think we are all right, depending on what we have witnessed.

Perhaps this all has to do with the degree of care that a patient needs. The more needy and ill a patient is, the more obvious the lack of good care. Those who can fend for themselves in even a minimal way can do without close monitoring. And their families can fill in the voids. But if things turn quickly from a good situation to another situation, then the cracks in the system start to show up and the patient is in grave danger of falling into one of those cracks.

As I said before, not every nurse was bad. Most were wonderful. But as Joe went into a more critical care situation, it just became horrendous, and that is what Susan's post says.

People who are getting paid to take care of ill people have an obligation to provide more than just "ordinary care". They have responsibilities that go beyond the norm, like it or not. That is the nature of what they have chosen to do.

I do not EVER again want to listen for 20 minutes to a nurse in the ICU gossip about her female patient to another nurse. I do not EVER again want to see 5 or 6 nurses standing around at the desk talking about a party when patient's buzzers were going off, and they did not respond. I do not EVER want to hear about an immobile patient who has to go to the bathroom being ignored for an hour. I heard one nurse tell a patient, as she was walking past the door, "I'm busy right now, just go in the bed, we'll take care of it later". This was a nice looking older woman she was speaking to, and the woman was devastated.

If this were just things that happened at one institution, I would say, never go there, problem solved. Unfortunately, this happened at more than one institution.

It is rather disgraceful.

And no, I wasn't always this much of an advocate. I started out trusting and being very nice and sweet. But layer after layer of neglect wore away my nice smile.

Those of you who have had a wonderful and caring experience are lucky, and I am happy for you.

I also applaud the good nurses and doctors who try their best and really care. I am sure you are in the majority.

My biggest hope is that managers in a hospital setting will read these posts and evaluate their own in house problems and try to correct them. Better supervision is needed and some of you doctors should be speaking up about what you know as well.

 

[briansmom]

Another perspective-
My son has received above and beyond care at Sharp Memorial. He is quite spoiled because he is the only 16 yr old heart patient they have ever had. He was also nearly dead when they got him and he walked out on his own 2 weeks later.
One of Brian's issues when he woke up was that his foot was numb (maybe from the CABG, maybe from one of the bypass machines they had to put him on) and as the foot started to wake up he wanted it rubbed - 24 hrs a day! The nurse could not possibly do that (and he was her only patient). Also, helping take care of him gave me a sense of purpose. I have control issues ;-) and it allows me to continue some delusion of control when he is in the hospital. When he was moved up to the step down ward I told his nurse that I was happy to get him his water, change his bed and do all the "little things" so that she could do "the things that she went to school to do". They were quite pleased with this attitude. I think all nurses are overworked because most care so much and they want to be able to make the patient feel better. If I can free up a little time for that, then I am happy to do so. It is better than sitting there (like I am right now again) and staring at my computer screen or TV.

 

[Gnusgal]

I completely agree that it is wonderful if family can stay with the patient and take some of the burden off of the nurse if possible. I'm not at all saying to leave them alone and let the nurse do it all. I simply wanted to point out to those who have not been in the hospital yet that they don't need to go in expecting the nurses to be neglectful, give wrong meds, etc. My husband actually has commented that there are some families he likes having around. The problem that he sometimes sees are those who question everything in an accusing manner, write down everything he does like they are looking for a reason to sue, and arguing with him about the orders he's been given by the doctor. Again, it's all about the attitude.

I also understand, Nancy, that you've had some horrible (and hopefully rare) experiences. I do not blame you at all for feeling you had to be on gaurd at all times. But I wanted to make sure new people were aware that this isn't always the case and if they don't have a way to have someone with them 24/7, they don't need to be afraid that they won't go home.