Visitors in hospital

[Star54]

Thanks Blanche,
Laughter really is the best medicine....!

 

[Dexter Bob]

Having only been home for 3 days post op, one other thing that happened that I didn't plan for was NOT having a phone in my room at all! I was gorked for about 4 days and can't remember who came to see me those days other than my wife. Day 5 she commented that serveral people had phoned her concerned cause nobody was answering the phone in my room. My nurse checked and found a phone never got plugged in for me! So I got a phone and was coherent enough to use it out-bound for some things I needed. I turned the ringer off the rest of the time

Bob

 

[Jkm7]

My first OHS at Mass General I was not permitted to use my cell phone. Four years later, same hospial, same surgeon, some of the same nurses, techs etc, I was allowed my cell. they still hads a house phone on my night table for me which was good but I preferred my cell. I didn't always answer the hospital phone if I wasn't in the mood to speak. Just because it rang, didn't mean I was required to answer.

 

[Lynlw]

Since this thread got a little side tracked from how do you tell poeple you don't want visators, to why it can be important to have someone there, I wanted to mention since we were talking about having someone there. Many hospitals these days have either a pull out chair/couch or even a cot if you ask for it, OR they might have a sleeping room for a family member. MANY times you can't stay with a patient 24/7 in ICU do to space ect, but you can once they move to stepdown or the main floor. IF there isn't something already in the room for you to sleep in, ask the nurse for a cot or where you can sleep. Also sometimes the sleeping room for family is pretty limited or they give people out of town the first dibs on them, some even have a lottery type system. SO this is a good thing to ask about during all the pre admission testing, what their policy is, do you have to ask to be put on a list ect.

 

[Jkm7]

I adore my husband and we've been married decades but the last thing I wanted was him with me 24/7. I know there is substance to what others have written and some need the constant attentiveness and assistance of a loved one but neither OHS did I feel the need or desire. That is NOT to say I'm not aware mistakes do happen even in the very best hospitals and sometimes no one ever really does know why their family member 'went bad' with little warning or expectation it would happen. I didn't want him constantly looking over the shoulder of medical professionals when I didn't feel the need.

We all make choices.
My choice was for DH to come, be with me and then leave and I feel it useful to mention this for 'waiting room folks' who could get the impression all of us want and/or need someone with them 24/7. Some of us did not do it that way and managed fine and it was our choice. My DH most assuredly was not 'offended'. It's good to give both viewpoints on such subjects IMO

 

[WilliamJE]

Does anyone have suggestions or comments on hospital visitors? Based on my prior surgeries (hip replacement, appendectomy) I don't think I will want to see anyone other than my husband..... It seems a bit egotistic to go around announcing you don't want any visitors (as if everyone was expecting to come!), but I don't think I am going to be very sociable. I have even told my two adult children that I would rather see them after I get home. Please comment on your experiences....can you leave a notice with the nurses' desk?

Surgery is coming up fast....Jan. 21....and I am still thinking of things to check out.

Pat

Pat,

You set the rules as to how many visitors you want and who.

My surgery(aneuyrsm repair and valve replacement) I knew was going to be a big deal before going in for it. The only visitors I asked my wife to allow were- Her sister, A Eucharistic minister to bring communion*, and two priests
from our church. No one else.

I don't have a long list of friends, and most are either co-workers, members of a cancer(malignant melanoma) email support group, or a Sci-Fi/fantasy fiction writer's forum I belong to and have stories at. Before surgery I chose one person from each to either be able to call me at the hosp. or stay in touch with Leonita with phone calls.

My wishes were adhered to, and my 16-day hospital stay saw just the visitors I wanted to. Two of my friends called. I wasn't doing to well at the time of the first call, but appreciated Sephrena calling.

*- My wife is also a eucharistic minister and she would bring me communion on Sunday. During the week, another EM named Barbara, brought me communion 2 or 3 times.

 

[james]

Keep them away until you are heathy enough to see them and even then you will need visitors help at home later more than in hospital.

 

[catwoman]

I didn't worry about telling people not to visit me -- I had surgery about 40-50 miles from my home. A group of friends did drive to Dallas to sit with John during my surgery, and 4 days post-op, our godchildren and their parents came to visit. All my family (parents, sister & bro-in-law, 2nd sister, nephew, 1 niece) visited throughout the 7 days I was hospitalized. It sure made the days less monotonous.
A friend who worked near Baylor Hospital dropped by two days post-op, after I had gotten my bag and some IVs out. She came around lunchtime, and I was so pleased to see her.

I am on quite a few cat-related message lists, so I designated a friend to disperse information (surgery update, recovery, hospital discharge, my parents' home address + phone # where I'd be for 2 weeks after discharge). That worked really well.

One of my sisters has had numerous surgeries. Sometimes she asks that no one come; she does that to discourage my parents (81 & 82YO) from feeling the need to drive to the hospital. Most of her hospitalizations have been fairly brief, and she's ready to go home by 3 days post-op.