Tips to help hubby post surgery?

[bridget8822]

Hello all - your posts have helped so much as we go through this journey. My husband is having a replacement valve and aortic aneurysm repaired on November 24th. He is 43 and in good heath otherwise. While I am scared I am trying to be strong for him and not let him see just how nervous I am. (Find me 10 minutes after they wheel him in to the OR and I bet you that I'll be a puddle). Anyway - does anyone have any thoughts about how to best make him comfortable at home or some things that made you all feel a bit better once you got home? I was thinking of getting a recliner?

Any ideas (and prayers) would be great! Thank you.

 

[cldlhd]

I was 45 when I had my surgery earlier this year and the power recliner helped but mostly just having her there helping me and being there when I needed,or wanted,help made a huge difference.

 

[pellicle]

Hi and welcome

cldlhd is about on the money there . We (my wife and I) got detailed instructions from the hospital. I would suggest you are there to take those in too. I'm sure he will be preoccupied with other issues and be a bit "stupid" for a while. There is a thing called pump head which really knocks some people more than others.

Strictly follow the instructions on lifting, especially for the first 5 weeks, but by week 8 the sternum bone will be knitted and you'll be past that phase.

Keep up the exersize, no matter what, if you are sore or what, get out and walk.

Be careful getting in and out of bed in the first weeks (they will tell you this) and keep a pillow handy for coughs and sneezes. The hospital will show you how to pull that in tight to lessen the pain.

otherwise its just a matter of being there to help. Keep a strong outlook and try to not focus on the negative. Entertain yourself if you can like my wife did.

Best Wishes

 

[honeybunny]

I bought a power lift recliner but to be honest, for the first three weeks, I went back and forth between it and the sofa. As the others have said, just having you there will help a great deal. My adult daughter lives with me and when she's home it's wonderful, but she travels three days at a time as a flight attendent and I've missed her when she's gone, even though I can do things for myself.

Best of everything to you both.

 

[ForeverThankful]

I'm 55 and just had surgery 3 weeks ago to replace a bicuspid aortic valve and aneurysm. We bought a recliner, electric, and it's been great! I'll probably sleep in it until I can sleep comfortably again on my side in bed.

Also comforting for me was just having my hubby home, I didn't want to be alone at first and I was somewhat dizzy and ditsy (bit of pump head I think) for a number of days so having him by my side was big.

Having him as my walking buddy is big too, or I should say strolling buddy!



Best of luck to you and your hubby!

 

[almost_hectic]

My tips:

1 just having someone there for you is most important for us surgery patients
2 a heating pad helped me quite a bit as my back and shoulders were very sore after surgery
3 having simple healthy snacks in the house, like yogurt, nuts or trail mix, or fruit was helpful for me until my appetite returned
4 the dry fit athletic shirts are great to wear, super soft against your incision and absorb sweat at night from pain meds
5 a note pad and pen always handy for making all sorts of notes about medical stuff from nurses and doctors

 

[Freddie]

As you can see, some people here liked having a recliner, others did without. I had 4 recliners that had a pull button on the side (2 in the the couch and 2 in the love seat) but didn't use them, so for you it will be a judgement call. But in either case, chances are that once you are home your husband will need assistance on getting in and out of a chair and bed. Eat, rest for 20 min and walk was my routine in the hospital and I continued that once I got home....walking is a must. Assistance might be needed when having a shower as your husband may not be able to move his shoulders to wash his hair. Reaching above the shoulders will be tough - I couldn't open the fridge door.
The first week or two will be slow, but slow and steady is better than fast and furious. His body will tell him when he's done to much.

Good Luck and try to carry on as if there was no surgery.

 

[bridget8822]

Thanks so much everyone. I've gotten so much insight from these boards. I will be there the whole time he's in the hospital and will work from home the first week he's home and then play the next week by ear. I get a little more nervous each day it gets closer.

 

[Zoltania]

As almost_hectic said, the most important thing is that you will be there to take care of your husband. This will be a huge load off his mind, I'm sure. You will undoubtedly figure out the practical stuff as you go along (what you need to go out and buy for him, etc.). Other things to keep in mind:

• Understand that he will have mood swings and that this is normal.
• Understand that you will probably have mood swings too, and acknowledge the fact that this is also a difficult time for you.

In terms of purely practical suggestions, here are a few things that I didn't know ahead of time:

• 7-day pillboxes are a big help. I used three of them (morning, evening, and Coumadin).
• If your husband needs to get up and take pain medication in the middle of the night, it's helpful to set it out before you go to bed. Mine was placed on a Post-It note so I could see it in a darkened bedroom.
• He might be on a low-sodium diet at first and will probably need to be consistent in vitamin K intake, so think about that when you are buying groceries.

And know that things will get better. The sun actually seems to shine more brightly for me now, just like people say it will, and even my morning coffee tastes better. Coming through this experience can be a great relief.

 

[paulcw16]

Buy a high quality wicking shirt like runners and hikers wear. He's likely to have night sweats and the chill will keep waking him up. The shirt will allow for more normal sleep. All the best to you both.

 

[paulcw16]

Buy a high quality wicking shirt like runners and hikers wear. He's likely to have night sweats and the chill will keep waking him up. The shirt will allow for more normal sleep. All the best to you both.

 

[Paleowoman]

Make sure you have your mobile phone on all night so if he is in a different room to you and needs you for something he can contact you with his mobile. Sounds silly but honestly during the first few days at home I was too weak to lift pillows etc during the night when I was downstairs on the sofa and hubby was upstairs in the bedroom. It was great being able to contact him effortlessly on the mobile so he could come down and help me ! Also, when I was in pain or needed a comforting warm drink and felt not well enough he could come down to me - I wouldn't have had the strength to shout !

 

[bridget8822]

Will do! We got him a power recliner this weekend. He has the pre-op tests tomorrow and then it's 2 weeks away. Sneaking up on us fast!

 

[ALLBETTERNOW!]

Hello all - your posts have helped so much as we go through this journey. My husband is having a replacement valve and aortic aneurysm repaired on November 24th. He is 43 and in good heath otherwise. While I am scared I am trying to be strong for him and not let him see just how nervous I am. (Find me 10 minutes after they wheel him in to the OR and I bet you that I'll be a puddle). Anyway - does anyone have any thoughts about how to best make him comfortable at home or some things that made you all feel a bit better once you got home? I was thinking of getting a recliner?

Any ideas (and prayers) would be great! Thank you.

I hope all is well, there are serious but relatively safe surgeries, more dangerous driving to and fromthen the surgery itself. You will both be fine. Prayers sent!!!

 

[bridget8822]

Thank you. He had his pre-op testing yesterday and last night had a bit of a breakdown. The tears began to flow. I think it became all to real that it is happening and he became frightened. I just kept telling myself, "Don't cry in front of him." because I don't want to scare him even more. But inside I am a big ball of nerves also.

 

[ALLBETTERNOW!]

Thank you. He had his pre-op testing yesterday and last night had a bit of a breakdown. The tears began to flow. I think it became all to real that it is happening and he became frightened. I just kept telling myself, "Don't cry in front of him." because I don't want to scare him even more. But inside I am a big ball of nerves also.

some of it sucks but coming out other side all will be better and no need for continued worries. He will look awful with lots of tubes when he comes out but within a day or 2 he'll be up and walking and home in a week. They know how to zig if the situation zags and have lots of drugs and knowledge to get this done!!! Drugs for both of you!!! if he's in hood shape and at a good center,I'm guessing the odds of coming thru unscathed are better than95 : 5in his favor