Hi Bonnie,
I'm only seven weeks out of surgery myself, so I am also experimenting with this scar stuff. I don't know whether this will help the tenderness or not....
After I already bought a supply of Vitamin E oil, Cocoa Butter, etc, my dermatologist told me to avoid all that, as they tend to cause the area to break out. She recommended using a light moisturizer, such as one you'd use for your face, and gave me a sample of Cetaphil (off-the-shelf stuff, I found it at CVS). She said it's very important to keep your scar moisturized, something about cells not being able to travel as well when skin is dry, particularly when there's scar tissue there. She also recommended Curad's "Scar Therapy" - pads that you put on your scar for 24 hours at a time, for maybe eight weeks or so. They're supposed to "make scars appear softer, smoother, and flatter", and are "clinically proven to make scars appear less visible". I've been using them for a week or so now...!
By the way, someone (doc, nurse) in the hospital told me to keep it out of the sun for a while, as that will cause the scar to permanently darken.... YIKES!!
So, for what this is worth.... I hope you find a good solution for you!
Jennie