Introduction

[pellicle]

Hi



and welcome ...

so far I've refrained from saying anything because I observe that I'm not good in helping with anxiety. Few think anything like me (as I'm not an emotional thinker even though I do have things I'm anxious about from time to time).

The thing about anxiety is to not allow it to be come "chronic" ... if it does its harder to weed out and will (to me) obsess you and control you.

So, if I may offer some perspectives on your issues


Firstly history in my view does not repeat, but often rhymes ... so your first point (which I understand as my mother died of early onset alzheimers so I am worried about that in myself) is that as well as the similarities

New to this forum! So I wanted to introduce myself (long post ahead):

I am a 29 year old white female with mild aortic stenosis ...
...In 2011, my Mom died at a young age from complications due to heart valve replacement surgery. In short, the autopsy & Doctors explained her heart was simply too weak to withstand the surgery. Cause of death: aortic stenosis, sepsis, shock. No other abnormalities noted in the report.

there must be also quite a number of differences, as I doubt that you mum was 29 when she passed away. This means that you have the benefit of being diagnosed much sooner and thus an intervention to save your life will happen.

A key difference to your mothers case.

If I may ask how old was she?

Next I'll say that your heart does not get weaker with stenosis, in fact the opposite ... it gets stronger. That is why the enlargement occurs. Your heart is a muscle and it is in training now because its faced with more resistance (caused by the stenosis) and just like Arnie is pumping up.

This is not actually a good thing because unlike going to the gym it doesn't get as much of a break AND unlike a muscle on the outside the muscle on the inside crowds things out. Then there is balance, one side is straining and the other not (imagine if the body builder only worked on one side of his body).

To me I see that you have an early diagnosis as a good thing.

That being, there is no proven way to reverse, stop, or slow the progression of aortic stenosis.

Actually that's not entirely correct, there is a method and its to replace that valve. Just like if you have a tap in the house driving you mad, replace it. Its proven to work and all of us here are evidence of that.

I had my first OHS surgery when I was about 10 and I'm 50 now (and had 2 more since then). I can understand you feeling worried about the surgery, but to be honest its amazingly well done and has a long history. I understood its the most successful surgical intervention in modern medicine.

Instead of focusing on not wanting OHS, instead focus on wanting to be better. I lost most of my childhood running around and exersize due to delay in surgery till I was older. It was a risk they chose. I had to fight my health back again when I lost it at 28 (lost my health due to the stenotic valve which was repaird), but having seen how much improvement occured when I was 10 I was actually keen to have the surgery ... The same occured again in 2010 when I identified that it was time for a checkup and found that valve leaking (and to my surprise an aneurysm) ... having been recently married I wanted to have the surgery as soon as was needed (even though the timing was inconvenient in the midst of our house renovations) so that I could continue my life together and healthy with my wife.

I believe you'll be fine, what needs to happen now is that you believe you'll be fine. I know that without actual "putting your hands in the hole the spear left" its hard, but I hope that with all the stories and support you get from us here you'll come to believe that you will be fine.

I hope this helps in any way ...

Best Wishes

 

[Jamieann]

Hi there! I'm 27 years old and had aortic valve replacement 6 months ago. I had some complications, but nothing I can't live with! Prior to my surgery I also had no symptoms, but when my cardiologist saw my ECHO last October he said I needed to have surgery. I was pretty anxious leading up to my surgery, and had a lot of worse case scenarios running through my head. Thankfully I made it through and here I am! Getting back to running and planning to run a half marathon in January.

On a side note.... I saw you had a TEE. I had a TEE as well and honestly thought being semi-awake during the TEE was a far worse experience than waking up from surgery (although I did not love waking up with the tube in my throat).

I will send positive thoughts and prayers for you as you navigate through this!

 

[Guest]

Thank you for being sensitive to my anxiety. It's a daily battle, just as real as my heart valve issue.

To answer your Q: she was 43. Please do not remind me how uncommonly young that is to die from aortic stenosis. I know. Doctors, friends, family, & strangers remind of me of that every time we discuss her death. Just as it was uncommon that my classmate's 30-year-old husband (a healthy, non-smoking athlete) was diagnosed w/ stage 4 esophageal cancer & died 10 months later. Unfortunately, none of us get out of this life alive, so I'm trying awfully hard not to dwell on the why's of dying at a young age. Side note: everything in her autopsy came back 'normal' except a heart under great distress.

I apologize for my few incorrect statements. I do understand that the heart doesn't necessarily get "weaker", but ends up working harder than it should. I also meant there's no way to reverse, stop, or slow the progression of AS naturally, without surgery.

Yes, you're quite right. I need to believe, or at least tell myself.. over and over.. that I will be okay. Having this community of support has already been helpful.

Thank you very much for your thoughtful response!

Hi



and welcome ...

so far I've refrained from saying anything because I observe that I'm not good in helping with anxiety. Few think anything like me (as I'm not an emotional thinker even though I do have things I'm anxious about from time to time).

The thing about anxiety is to not allow it to be come "chronic" ... if it does its harder to weed out and will (to me) obsess you and control you.

So, if I may offer some perspectives on your issues


Firstly history in my view does not repeat, but often rhymes ... so your first point (which I understand as my mother died of early onset alzheimers so I am worried about that in myself) is that as well as the similarities




there must be also quite a number of differences, as I doubt that you mum was 29 when she passed away. This means that you have the benefit of being diagnosed much sooner and thus an intervention to save your life will happen.

A key difference to your mothers case.

If I may ask how old was she?

Next I'll say that your heart does not get weaker with stenosis, in fact the opposite ... it gets stronger. That is why the enlargement occurs. Your heart is a muscle and it is in training now because its faced with more resistance (caused by the stenosis) and just like Arnie is pumping up.

This is not actually a good thing because unlike going to the gym it doesn't get as much of a break AND unlike a muscle on the outside the muscle on the inside crowds things out. Then there is balance, one side is straining and the other not (imagine if the body builder only worked on one side of his body).

To me I see that you have an early diagnosis as a good thing.



Actually that's not entirely correct, there is a method and its to replace that valve. Just like if you have a tap in the house driving you mad, replace it. Its proven to work and all of us here are evidence of that.

I had my first OHS surgery when I was about 10 and I'm 50 now (and had 2 more since then). I can understand you feeling worried about the surgery, but to be honest its amazingly well done and has a long history. I understood its the most successful surgical intervention in modern medicine.

Instead of focusing on not wanting OHS, instead focus on wanting to be better. I lost most of my childhood running around and exersize due to delay in surgery till I was older. It was a risk they chose. I had to fight my health back again when I lost it at 28 (lost my health due to the stenotic valve which was repaird), but having seen how much improvement occured when I was 10 I was actually keen to have the surgery ... The same occured again in 2010 when I identified that it was time for a checkup and found that valve leaking (and to my surprise an aneurysm) ... having been recently married I wanted to have the surgery as soon as was needed (even though the timing was inconvenient in the midst of our house renovations) so that I could continue my life together and healthy with my wife.

I believe you'll be fine, what needs to happen now is that you believe you'll be fine. I know that without actual "putting your hands in the hole the spear left" its hard, but I hope that with all the stories and support you get from us here you'll come to believe that you will be fine.

I hope this helps in any way ...

Best Wishes

 

[Guest]

Thank you for the insight!

May I ask what element of the echo the Dr was most concerned about (if no symptoms), i.e. the narrowing of the valve, the heart appeared to be working too hard, etc? Sounds like you had 6 months to prep before surgery.. did you do anything specific before then? Did you have a big physical support system? Which valve did you choose? And how was recovery?

Sorry, lots of Qs

A half marathon in January?! Wowza.. very impressive!

Hi there! I'm 27 years old and had aortic valve replacement 6 months ago. I had some complications, but nothing I can't live with! Prior to my surgery I also had no symptoms, but when my cardiologist saw my ECHO last October he said I needed to have surgery. I was pretty anxious leading up to my surgery, and had a lot of worse case scenarios running through my head. Thankfully I made it through and here I am! Getting back to running and planning to run a half marathon in January.

On a side note.... I saw you had a TEE. I had a TEE as well and honestly thought being semi-awake during the TEE was a far worse experience than waking up from surgery (although I did not love waking up with the tube in my throat).

I will send positive thoughts and prayers for you as you navigate through this!

 

[pickaback2]

Thank you for being sensitive to my anxiety. It's a daily battle, just as real as my heart valve issue.

To answer your Q: she was 43. Please do not remind me how uncommonly young that is to die from aortic stenosis. I know. Doctors, friends, family, & strangers remind of me of that every time we discuss her death. Just as it was uncommon that my classmate's 30-year-old husband (a healthy, non-smoking athlete) was diagnosed w/ stage 4 esophageal cancer & died 10 months later. Unfortunately, none of us get out of this life alive, so I'm trying awfully hard not to dwell on the why's of dying at a young age. Side note: everything in her autopsy came back 'normal' except a heart under great distress.

I apologize for my few incorrect statements. I do understand that the heart doesn't necessarily get "weaker", but ends up working harder than it should. I also meant there's no way to reverse, stop, or slow the progression of AS naturally, without surgery.

Yes, you're quite right. I need to believe, or at least tell myself.. over and over.. that I will be okay. Having this community of support has already been helpful.

Thank you very much for your thoughtful response!

Pell, We have somewhat similar histories. I had first open heart surgery at age 10 and am 50 now. Now I am waiting to be scheduled to have 2 valves replaced. The difference is this will be my second OHS. You sound like you have gone through a lot. Thanks for sharing your experiences.

 

[pickaback2]

I apparently quoted the wrong thing and don't want to try again and repeat the error. I was trying to respond to Pellicle's post. Pickaback 2

 

[Jamieann]

Thank you for the insight!

May I ask what element of the echo the Dr was most concerned about (if no symptoms), i.e. the narrowing of the valve, the heart appeared to be working too hard, etc? Sounds like you had 6 months to prep before surgery.. did you do anything specific before then? Did you have a big physical support system? Which valve did you choose? And how was recovery?

Sorry, lots of Qs

A half marathon in January?! Wowza.. very impressive!

Sure thing! Ultimately the stenosis was growing worse, and my valve was leaking quite a bit. Additionally, my cardiologist wanted me to get surgery before the dysfunction in my valve caused other issues with my heart. Prior to my surgery, I'd asked my surgeon to take a picture of the valve during surgery, and it was pretty gruesome looking- actually much worse than they anticipated from the echo so good thing I got it done when I did!

During the time when I found out I had to have surgery and when I actually had to have surgery, my cardiologist said I needed to not get my HR up during exercise as that could pose a risk. So I just lived my life, ate healthy and mostly just walked for exercise.

In terms of a support system, I'm married so my hubs was a great help. My parents came into town and were here while I was in the hospital (there for a week) but then had to leave. I was home from work for about 6 weeks and I managed at home fine while my husband was working. People from church brought us a couple meals a week and helped drive me to dr appts before I was cleared to drive. Honestly recovery was ok- there was pain and it was hard to sleep at night but all in all nothing too crazy.

I ended up choosing a bovine valve so I wouldn't have to take warfarin. My main reason in doing so is that my husband and I don't have kids yet and I didn't want to deal with the complications of warfarin during pregnancy. (That being said I did have a stroke 4 months after surgery so now am on warfarin anyway but that's another story).

For me, It seemed so long and hard and slow when in the midst of all of it, but then you blink and you're through it. The other day I was thinking that it's been 6.5 months since surgery, 2.5 months since my stroke, and yesterday I ran/walked 3 miles and this morning did a workout at Orangetheory Fitness. Our bodies are so resilient. For me as well, my faith played a huge role in my comfort as I healed.

 

[Superbob]

Welcome to the forum. You seem to be well-informed and there's every reason to believe you will do well. Try not to let the anxiety get to you. Find the relaxation techniques that work best for you. I am glad to see you are receiving much good support here.

 

[pellicle]

Hi

Pell, We have somewhat similar histories. I had first open heart surgery at age 10 and am 50 now.

indeed, so it seems ... what was the OHS at 10? Aortic Valve? (Aortic Valve Replacement - AVR)

Now I am waiting to be scheduled to have 2 valves replaced. The difference is this will be my second OHS. You sound like you have gone through a lot. Thanks for sharing your experiences.

ok ... I'm going out on a limb here and guessing you had a Ross done at 10 ... no?

Best Wishes

PS: just checked your Bio (didn't want to peek first)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Septal_myectomy

interesting ...

 

[pellicle]

Hi

Thank you for being sensitive to my anxiety. It's a daily battle, just as real as my heart valve issue.

mental health (aka happiness) is actually a daily battle for some of us isn't it.

Myself I'm don't recall ever being worried about my heart valve surgeries. However , I've had a few post surgical battles to fight (as you may read here) starting back in about 2012.

I have my own views on death and timing. I guess I was "lucky" to have early experience with my (grew up together in the same neighbourhood) best friend die of Hodgkins Lymphoma at 20 and then my wife (just a few years ago now) die of a brain tumor (called a Glioblastoma). Both were "uncommonly young".

The dice roll which is life does not take into account age when you roll even if it is one way or another for general populations.

everything in her autopsy came back 'normal' except a heart under great distress.

which to me solidifies my view that you will do well and respond well to surgery ... especially if your general health is good now

I apologize for my few incorrect statements. I do understand that

no problems, I wasn't intending to "chide you" but was just clarifying things as I try not to make any assumptions about general knowledge levels

Yes, you're quite right. I need to believe, or at least tell myself.. over and over.. that I will be okay. Having this community of support has already been helpful.

Thank you very much for your thoughtful response!

My view is that while telling yourself "you'll be all right" is a good start, if you don't begin to believe it you then need to ask "yourself why not?"

Much can be found in understanding yourself, and my experience has been that these sorts of events can help one to understand ones self and to become a stronger (and perhaps different) person.

Lastly, on the theme that London Andy raised, (of Knowledge being power) I'll post you my blog entry on self management of AC therapy using a self testing machine. I do believe strongly that this is the future (and the general results sure support that) and that if you put in a little thought (and you seem inclined that way) you can soon not only be advocate for your health, but more in control of it too.

http://cjeastwd.blogspot.com/2014/09/managing-my-inr.html

When / If you start on warfarin ping me here (or by email) and I'll do my best to help you settle in to self management. Like you say, it saves you having to muck about at clinics at the very least.

Best Wishes

 

[pickaback2]

Diagnosed with HCM at age 2.
At 10, they went in to replace the aortic valve, found it was fine, and took away some of the thickening. So, a myectomy.
My son had a hole in his heart repaired as a child. What a huge difference those few decades made.
Having surgery as a child in the 1970s was a not-so-pleasant experience, from what I recall.
How are you now?

Hi



indeed, so it seems ... what was the OHS at 10? Aortic Valve? (Aortic Valve Replacement - AVR)



ok ... I'm going out on a limb here and guessing you had a Ross done at 10 ... no?

Best Wishes

PS: just checked your Bio (didn't want to peek first)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Septal_myectomy

interesting ...

 

[pickaback2]

Diagnosed with HCM at age 2.
At 10, they went in to replace the aortic valve, found it was fine, and took away some of the thickening. So, a myectomy.
My son had a hole in his heart repaired as a child. What a huge difference those few decades made.
Having surgery as a child in the 1970s was a not-so-pleasant experience, from what I recall.
How are you now?

Hi



indeed, so it seems ... what was the OHS at 10? Aortic Valve? (Aortic Valve Replacement - AVR)



ok ... I'm going out on a limb here and guessing you had a Ross done at 10 ... no?

Best Wishes

PS: just checked your Bio (didn't want to peek first)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Septal_myectomy

interesting ...

 

[pellicle]

At 10, they went in to replace the aortic valve, found it was fine,

so they left it?

My son had a hole in his heart repaired as a child. What a huge difference those few decades made.

not least in medical diagnostic imaging!!

Hope your son is doing well (such was always a fear of mine)

How are you now?

I'm doing as well as one would expect for a 50 YO. I'm back in Finland now and cycling around the joint (eschewing a car for the health benefits I found it brings) and preparing fitness for winter here (was in winter in Australia before I left, where a car | motorcycle was mandatory for many reasons). I'm hoping to get my fitness up to a level to do a particular ski tour (probably alone) up in the very north of Sweden in late winter. We'll see if I'm able to pull it together. I have some doubts (and the occluded brachiocephalic vein from last surgery is not my partner in that.

I'm also still on Antibiotics as a result of my last surgery where gifted with a propionibacteria infection (normally associated with other prosthetics) which was (happily) confined to the wires. As noone knows if its gone and it in theory could come back (with negative consequences) I remain on oral antibiotics (500mg 3x daily)

Aside from that I think that I'm doing better than any of my cousins who did not suffer my heart issues. Amazing what a difference clean living makes ;-)

Hope you're well too.

 

[pickaback2]

Pellicle,

Yes, they left the valve.

My son is doing great, with no restrictions, even playing competitive sports.

Sounds like your heart is working well. I did fairly well for 40 years, but developed severe symptoms more recently and am oxygen dependent. Am waiting to hear about the next step in having 2 valves replaced with mechanical versions in OHS.

 

[Trinalovescats]

TLC2U-

Well,I was in the hospital for 14 days;6 of those days I was sedated.When I woke up,the breathing tube was already out.I had a sore throat for a month.I also had a feeding tube.

too answer your question,I did pretty well in recovery.I was confused on my days for a bit but other than that I was good.

 

[jwinter]

I just wanted to post a hello and welcome. I am new here also but spent a lot of time here after my first surgery. As I face the second I knew they have good support and I decided to join.
You have come to the right place

 

[Guest]

Sorry for the delayed response! I never received any emails informing me of these follow-up replies.

Your plan of attack (walking, eating healthy) is pretty much what I'm focusing on. I'm also integrating meditation & other mind/body techniques to reduce my anxiety. I'm relieved to hear recovery went well (minus the stroke). I believe I am able to take up to 6 months short-term disability from work to recover, so I'm not too worried about rushing my body to heal.

As for the type of valve, my fiance & I do not have children yet either. However, we've discussed this in length (before all this even went down) & have decided we're not too keen on having our own children. So I'll likely go the mechanical route. That being said, we have discussed other options, i.e. adoption, surrogacy, etc, if we change our mind. I'm grateful we're on the same page & our parents support us (not that they have much say in the matter, LOL).

As far as faith goes, I do consider myself spiritual & am trying to embrace my own faith as I journey through this.

Sure thing! Ultimately the stenosis was growing worse, and my valve was leaking quite a bit. Additionally, my cardiologist wanted me to get surgery before the dysfunction in my valve caused other issues with my heart. Prior to my surgery, I'd asked my surgeon to take a picture of the valve during surgery, and it was pretty gruesome looking- actually much worse than they anticipated from the echo so good thing I got it done when I did!

During the time when I found out I had to have surgery and when I actually had to have surgery, my cardiologist said I needed to not get my HR up during exercise as that could pose a risk. So I just lived my life, ate healthy and mostly just walked for exercise.

In terms of a support system, I'm married so my hubs was a great help. My parents came into town and were here while I was in the hospital (there for a week) but then had to leave. I was home from work for about 6 weeks and I managed at home fine while my husband was working. People from church brought us a couple meals a week and helped drive me to dr appts before I was cleared to drive. Honestly recovery was ok- there was pain and it was hard to sleep at night but all in all nothing too crazy.

I ended up choosing a bovine valve so I wouldn't have to take warfarin. My main reason in doing so is that my husband and I don't have kids yet and I didn't want to deal with the complications of warfarin during pregnancy. (That being said I did have a stroke 4 months after surgery so now am on warfarin anyway but that's another story).

For me, It seemed so long and hard and slow when in the midst of all of it, but then you blink and you're through it. The other day I was thinking that it's been 6.5 months since surgery, 2.5 months since my stroke, and yesterday I ran/walked 3 miles and this morning did a workout at Orangetheory Fitness. Our bodies are so resilient. For me as well, my faith played a huge role in my comfort as I healed.

 

[Guest]

Thank you! I have been trying very hard to do just that. Guided imagery CDs, meditation, affirmations, EFT, even talking to my "Mom" - I realize some of it might seem hokey, but I view it as a way to relax my body & focus on the now. Breaking down a barrier [stress] that can inhibit the healing process. If stress can cause negative physical symptoms, why can't relaxation promote healing? Sure doesn't hurt!

Welcome to the forum. You seem to be well-informed and there's every reason to believe you will do well. Try not to let the anxiety get to you. Find the relaxation techniques that work best for you. I am glad to see you are receiving much good support here.

 

[Guest]

"The dice roll which is life does not take into account age when you roll even if it is one way or another for general populations." What a wonderful quote. I will most definitely check-in with you/this forum throughout this entire process, including self testing.

Hi



mental health (aka happiness) is actually a daily battle for some of us isn't it.

Myself I'm don't recall ever being worried about my heart valve surgeries. However , I've had a few post surgical battles to fight (as you may read here) starting back in about 2012.

I have my own views on death and timing. I guess I was "lucky" to have early experience with my (grew up together in the same neighbourhood) best friend die of Hodgkins Lymphoma at 20 and then my wife (just a few years ago now) die of a brain tumor (called a Glioblastoma). Both were "uncommonly young".

The dice roll which is life does not take into account age when you roll even if it is one way or another for general populations.




which to me solidifies my view that you will do well and respond well to surgery ... especially if your general health is good now




no problems, I wasn't intending to "chide you" but was just clarifying things as I try not to make any assumptions about general knowledge levels




My view is that while telling yourself "you'll be all right" is a good start, if you don't begin to believe it you then need to ask "yourself why not?"

Much can be found in understanding yourself, and my experience has been that these sorts of events can help one to understand ones self and to become a stronger (and perhaps different) person.

Lastly, on the theme that London Andy raised, (of Knowledge being power) I'll post you my blog entry on self management of AC therapy using a self testing machine. I do believe strongly that this is the future (and the general results sure support that) and that if you put in a little thought (and you seem inclined that way) you can soon not only be advocate for your health, but more in control of it too.

http://cjeastwd.blogspot.com/2014/09/managing-my-inr.html

When / If you start on warfarin ping me here (or by email) and I'll do my best to help you settle in to self management. Like you say, it saves you having to muck about at clinics at the very least.

Best Wishes

 

[Guest]

UPDATE 10/25/16:

Last Monday I had my echocardiogram. My fiancé went with me. He did very well considering how squeamish hospitals usually make him. The procedure lasted about an hour & half. The tech rotated between an adult & pediatric probe (I'm very naturally petite). Just like the first time 3 years ago, he had quite a bit of difficulty getting good photos. In fact, he said technicians usually take 52 photos. He took 106. Two echo's for the price of one he joked. I left quite sore with a few bruises. Didn't help that my puppy recently yanked my arm so hard it popped a couple ribs out of place, so I'm currently still healing from that.

The results were loaded into an online portal available for me to view last Friday. I have an appointment with cardiologist #2 on 11/17 to discuss the results, & I'll let her explain everything in detail. But from what I could understand thus far: my aortic valve stenosis has progressed to a severe level. There also appears to be something going on w/ a mitral valve leaflet. And a little bit of regurgitation (leakage). The rest of the report read fairly well: good BP & oxygen levels, normal left ventricular systolic function/wall thickness/wall motion/ventricular dimensions/right ventricular size & systolic function/right & left atrial size/ascending aorta dimension. No pericardial effusion (fluid around the heart), intracardiac masses, or thrombi (blood clots). I also know I have good cholesterol, etc.

As I mentioned, no point playing Dr. Google lol, but my gut instinct tells me both cardiologists will want to do another TEE to get a closer look. Which hell, isn't necessarily a bad thing before I opt for such an invasive procedure. I also have a feeling surgery will happen much, much sooner than I expected. If the echo results are correct, my stenosis has progressed significantly in 3 years. It appears my heart is still pretty strong, but nonetheless a 'severe' diagnosis is nothing to play around with. And I certainly don't want to wait for symptoms to appear before having surgery.

The unknown/timing is what bums me out most. These next two months are my fiancé’s busiest (he works 7 days/week running his family's business). We plan to move houses in January, marry in April, honeymoon through 5/2. I'm hoping my heart is healthy enough to allow me to do those things first. I'll be much more comfortable recovering in the new house, won't have to worry about moving the dates of our wedding or honeymoon, & I'll have a little more time to prep. But if all the doctors I consult with say 'Do it now!', then I'll do it. My primary cardiologist said she'd have me talk to a couple surgeons (here locally & at the Cleveland Clinic). Even though it'd require traveling, I think I'd feel more comfortable going to Cleveland (if it's a good fit) considering my mother's history. Different hospital, different city, different experience, different.. better.. outcome! I've only told a few people thus far. All have been very supportive. I won't make any formal announcements until much closer to surgery time. I don't need the judgment, worry, or questions (especially because we only lost Mom 6 years ago) from other people spiking my anxiety any more than it already is.

I'll be perfectly honest though.. Friday's news hit me hard. I really did not expect everything to happen so soon. On top of it being my own busy season (I work full time + run a photography business), my rib injury, & finding out I'm about to have OHS much sooner than I ever planned.. I sunk pretty low Friday & Saturday. I stayed home from work & slept.. a lot. I'm feeling a tad better today. I'm trying to focus on one day at a time... getting enough sleep, staying hydrated, eating well, taking (short) walks, meditating/listening to guided imagery CDs/reading helpful books, & enjoying life.

Thank you again for all of the support!