How do you handle it?

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Debrinha GT

Debrinha GT

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 19, 2004
Messages
1,090
Location
Scotland
I`ve had to go to doctors` so many times in my life I`ve even lost count, and I`ve always found it easier if I have someone to go along, especially if there`s the risk of getting unpleasant or worrying news. However, ever since I moved to Scotland it`s not been easy to get someone to go with me as people have their own things to do. There`s also the fact that it has to be someone I feel comfortable with, you know, there are people that can make matters even worse for you instead. On Wednesday for instance, I have an appointment with the lung specialist to find out what the outcome of the biopsy was so yes, I`m feeling very nervous about it, but it looks like I`ll have to do this on my own. My husbamd can`t take time off work and my friends have work to go too as well. How do you handle this sort of thing?
Hugs,
Debora
 
Debora,

I go to most of my appointments alone but I take my notebook and write down everything I want to remember. Chris will go with me if he is off work but that doesn't happen often and he likes to know what happens. I find that if I do not write things down, I forget most of them (although not important things - just the tiny details).

Perhaps writing things will help for you or even recording the visit (with your doctor's okay, of course).;):D
 
I have a small notebook that I use to enter questions and answers at each visit to any medical provider.

I usually also take someone with me who also takes notes.

I once took a small tape recorder and asked the Doctor if he would mind if I recorded our meeting. He had no problem with that.
 
Unless I'm going to a specialist, I don't sweat a primary doctor visit. I will definitely make a note of the general purpose of the visit or any new information from it on my google calendar. I take my poor wife with me to the specialists sometimes. As far as the stress, I don't handle big news well. My wife is the only person that can help me in a situation like that.
 
Deborah, I think the answer is to detach your emotions from the consultation. To go there with your mind in a spin is unproductive. Just try to keep focused on practical matters. Pause and think through the information given. Then ask questions about anything you don't fully understand or was badly explained. It is your time with the doctor, don't be hustled out until you feel all is clear. If you see one of the junior departmental doctors and are dissatisfied, feel free to ask to see the Consultant themselves. The consultant will send a letter to your GP outlining their view of your condition. You are entitled to view that letter and seek further explanation from your GP.
 
Hi Debora...I think Bonzodog has the right idea...I remember a few of my pre-surgery consults were alone. It would be great if you could have someone come with you but it doesnt always hapen that way. Take notes and treat it like a business appointment. Be strong and try keep those emotions away until you get home. I fell in an emotional heap whilst driving home from booking my OHS all by myself. Once I got home and took a Valium and had a coffee I was fine again.

I will be praying for you on Wednesday...let us know how you get on.
 
Hey Deb,
from someone who's still on the lerning curve for this one,
I think, although its difficult, detaching from the emotional side of things is the way to go, back in january when I went to my peds cardio on an "emergency" call (I called at 11 and was in by 2) I was totally distraught when I first found out, I had no time to prepare, and was emotionally a wreck, I look back on it now, and I think I instinctively withdrew on the drive to the office (over 1 and a half hours) I was "ok" during the visit (as ok as a 21 yr old on an emergency cardiologist visit can be) this made me think objectively, and get alot of my questions answered, I felt like I got somewheres when I walked out of that office, but I think the most imporntant thing I learned from one of my ACHA friends is to treat yourself after your appt to some kind of a treat (a piece of clothes, a milkshake, Ice cream, right now for me it would be a starbucks mocha frappuchino) as good as I think taking a notebook is to an appt, I dont find it very practical (fumbling for my notebook and pen while I'm still covered in electrodes and echo goop and writing things down while my long time cradio of 21 yrs and I are having a heart to heart just doesnt work that well) and as far as finding someone to come with me, I have a hard time with that too, mom could come, but she usually takes over the appt because Dr Yeager and her are so used to talking to each other, and I dont really have very many others that could go with me. . .

so, I think its a matter of detaching, if you have to put yourself on the beach while you are on the way there, and dont forget to treat yourself afterwards, its more than worth it

hope this helps

Morgan, 21
 
Debora, I am just the opposite from you. I have always gone to these visits alone and really consider this time with my cardio as my own private "thing". When my cardio told me he wanted to meet with both my husband and I last fall, I felt really awkward taking him with me. I felt the same when we were at the Mayo before my surgery and we were meeting with my cardio and my surgeon. In 24 years together, he had never once gone with me.

Kim
 
It`s tomorrow

It`s tomorrow

Thank you all very much for replying and sharing your own experience with me. Joe`s taking time off work to go with along, but I didn`t have to ask. I`ll also take 1mg of lorazepan when I wake up as the appointment is at 10:30. The reason why I`m more aprehensive than usual is because this time it`s to get the result of a lung biopsy so you can imagine the sort of thing going through my mind here. The cardio has said that they want to replace my valve soon, but first they have to figure out what the problem in my lung is before they`ll even start talking about the surgery. They`ve detected a lumpy shadow with a black spot in the middle. It`s a suspicious looking mass, 6cm but since the bronchoscopy was inconclusive, they hope the biopsy will provede them with the answer. I`m scared!! Any experts on lung disease here who could shed some light on this for me, by the way?
Debora
 
I can`t believe it!!!

I can`t believe it!!!

Hi everyone.
I`ve been to the doctor`s and unfortunately it is a malignant tumour. Got knows how it got in there! Apparently it`s in an auckward place, according to them, near some major vessels and the heart so it looks like operation isn`t an option. Within a few days I`ll be going for this pet scan which will give them some more information. They want to know if it did start in the lung or came from somewhere else such as my ovaries, etc. I`m really freaking out here but I`m doing my very best to remain positive. At this point I don`t know what kind of treatment they`ll give me and I`m a bit annoyed about all the waiting as time`s precious here. But I guess they know what they`re doing. Now, my heart which was my main issue has been put aside until this gets taken care of. Please, keep on praying. My mum and daughter are coming to Scotland and will be here for a while, and that will definitely cheer me up!
That`s all for now
Debora
 
Hi From NZ

Hi From NZ

Hi Debora,
Just received your email.
Thinking of you and sending you & Joe all our love & prayers.
Ernie Wendy & fam.
xxxxx
 
Hey Debora, I am have been reading up on your story and loved seeing your wedding photos. Just want you to know that I really feel for what you are going through at the moment, so hope you hang in there, and take special care, and remember we are all here to listen to you.

Carolyn
 
Hi Debora,

I am sorry to hear that you got some bad news. I just wanted to wish you well and also tell you that a friend of mine had a significant portion of her lung removed about 2 years ago due to a malignant tumour and she is doing fine. She has no problems whatsoever. She is having 6monthly scans and her scan taken about 3 weeks ago is still clear. So, keep your chin up and enjoy your daughter and your Mums visit. Will keep praying for you. Best Wishes.
 
I second the tape recorder. Although I have never taken one as my wife normally goes with me, I know it can be of help from when I was in college. I could then concentrate on what questions I wanted to ask and not have to worry about jotting items down. Then you could replay it over again to make sure you heard everything.
 
Debrinha GT said:
Hi everyone.
I`ve been to the doctor`s and unfortunately it is a malignant tumour. Got knows how it got in there! Apparently it`s in an auckward place, according to them, near some major vessels and the heart so it looks like operation isn`t an option. Within a few days I`ll be going for this pet scan which will give them some more information. They want to know if it did start in the lung or came from somewhere else such as my ovaries, etc. I`m really freaking out here but I`m doing my very best to remain positive. At this point I don`t know what kind of treatment they`ll give me and I`m a bit annoyed about all the waiting as time`s precious here. But I guess they know what they`re doing. Now, my heart which was my main issue has been put aside until this gets taken care of. Please, keep on praying. My mum and daughter are coming to Scotland and will be here for a while, and that will definitely cheer me up!
That`s all for now
Debora
Click to expand...

Dear Debora,

I'm so sorry to hear these news; you certainly don't need this w/all that's in your plate already!!!! I am praying so hard for you & please keep in mind Jacqui's previous post ---- leave it in the Lord's hands Debora --- HE will take care of everything, of that I am soooo sure!

I'm so glad your husband is by your side ---- that in itself is a BIG comfort! Enjoy your mum's & daughter's visit!

Prayers & hugs to you!
 
Deb...I'm so sorry that you have this to deal with on top of averything else.....When it rains sometimes it pours and it has been pouring on you for a while now:(....We will have you inour prayers.....try and keep upbeat and positive....:)
 
Hi Deb,
Sorry to hear about the lung issue. I just dealt with that in Nov.of 2007.
Mine had been in there for awhile before my OHS but I took care of the heart issue first. Thought I was ok with the lung thing and one morning it burst and
I started coughing up blood. Went into ER and they had to air-vac me to a bigger hospital to do emergency surgery. They took out the upper right part of my lung. They are pretty sure they got it all. That surgery was worse then the OHS because I was'nt at all ready for it.
Let us know what you are doing? I will be praying for you. Just don't wait too long to get it taken care of like I did.
Keep the family going with you they are a comfort. Crystal
 
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