Michelle,
I know you are frustrated, but you have to reach deep inside and make up your mind this is not going to beat you. I have not had any complications since leaving the hospital, but had a lot while I was there - 5 days in CICU and 12 days in hospital. The vibration has challenged me mentally and has made me very blue. Every doctor that I have seen eyes get really big when they touch me and I can tell they are surprised at what they feel. Then they comment about how pronounced it is or how surprised they are. ALthough this is driving me crazy i decided a little while ago that it was not going to beat me.
I think the thing that really did it for me was when I heard about the woman in Texas - Lori. Did you hear this story? About 2-3 weeks ago she went in to have her mitral valve replaced and passed away a day or two later with complications. She was my age and had three children (8, 6, 3) I believe. The 6 year old has Down's syndrome. I cried when I read about this and was very upset for several days. This made everything very real for me. I realized how serious this was (which I knew it was), how lucky I was to undergo a surgery for 9.5 hours, 4 hours on bypass, be put into hypothermia, etc. and survive. I realized that I am blessed to be here. This isn't a lecture - this is just something that helped me and I thought might help you. This is an ordeal we have all been through and our bodies do protest sometimes. I figured out somehow I have to find a way to deal with this vibrating - if it was just sound it would be easier, but the resonation through my body is challenging. HOWEVER, I AM HERE and WE ARE HERE - so we are very blessed, arent we? I hope this helps. We are all here supporting you and you will get through this - this is just a bump in the road. BUt KEEP MOTORING!!
Love ya,
Cherie'