Decisions decisions decisions

[Guest]

If you have a decision (major or minor doesn't matter) that you need to make and you've done all of the "pros and cons" lists, etc. ... and still neither side jumps out as the "better" decision ... how do decide? What do you DO to decide? Yeah, I know "give it time" is one answer ... but, what if you feel that you don't have much time to decide?

Notice I indicated "better" decision ... as opposed to the "right" decision. Many times a "right" decision doesn't really exist. Even "better" doesn't cut it, because what is "better" for you in your eyes may not be what really IS "better" for you...if that makes any sense.

*sighs*

Yes, I'm being cryptic and not making much sense, but I bet people know what I mean anyway.... I just have a few decisions that really SHOULD be made ... and the sooner the better. I've reviewed the pros/cons, etc., and still haven't made up my mind...one way or another.



Cort:33swm."Mr Monte Carlo.Mr Road Trip".pig valve.pacemaker
WRMNshowcase.lego.HO.model.MCs.RT.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"I'm taking a chance" ... Lifehouse ... 'First Time'

 

[briansmom]

Sometimes when the choice isn't very clear (assuming a genuine consideration of all the pros and cons), I will literally flip a coin. What I find then is that I am subconsciously rooting for a certain outcome. So if the flip comes out for choice A and I say to myself well I really hoped it would come out B, then I go with B and hope that my gut feel is correct. I also do the 10 year test - will my decision make any difference in 10 years? If the answer is no, then I don't sweat it and the coin flip is a legit method. If the answer is yes, then I do the pros and cons list, etc. and then make a decision. It is far more stressful to not make a decision, then to just go for it (as all of us who have had to make that mechanical vs tissue decision know all too well).

 

[MaryC]

Cort,
It really is a difficult thing we have to do every day - make life changing decisions. My husband and I often go back over decisions we had to make over the years that had a direct impact on our family lives. In all cases, when we look back, the decision we made was the one that was the best outcome for our family and specifically for our children. In the short term, what I tend to do after I have made a decision is to continually tell myself things to reinforce my decision.

Here's an exampe of a decision I made a few years ago that worked out well for me. I work for a large corporation and the project I was working on was being significantly downsized. 1800 of us were told we had 60 days to find other jobs within the company or we would no longer have jobs with the company. Everyone I knew only put in for jobs that were the same level but I wanted a job that fit me and also where I felt there was less likelihood of me having to do this again soon. I ended up taking a downgrade and all of my friends stayed at the same level. I joked with them I would end up getting promoted again and get another raise for being promoted. I really was joking but that's exactly what happened 1 year later. And I ended up working with a group I absolutely loved. The bottom line is let your intuition guide you and it will work out.

 

[geebee]

You should go with the decision that eliminates the source of all this indecision. I truly believe you already know the right decision for you, you just don't like the answer short term. Go with that choice and you will end up with much less turmoil.

Life's too short - eat dessert first.

Cryptic enough?

 

[Mary]

If you have a decision (major or minor doesn't matter) that you need to make and you've done all of the "pros and cons" lists, etc. ... and still neither side jumps out as the "better" decision ... how do decide? What do you DO to decide? Yeah, I know "give it time" is one answer ... but, what if you feel that you don't have much time to decide?

Notice I indicated "better" decision ... as opposed to the "right" decision. Many times a "right" decision doesn't really exist. Even "better" doesn't cut it, because what is "better" for you in your eyes may not be what really IS "better" for you...if that makes any sense.

*sighs*

Yes, I'm being cryptic and not making much sense, but I bet people know what I mean anyway.... I just have a few decisions that really SHOULD be made ... and the sooner the better. I've reviewed the pros/cons, etc., and still haven't made up my mind...one way or another.



Cort:33swm."Mr Monte Carlo.Mr Road Trip".pig valve.pacemaker
WRMNshowcase.lego.HO.model.MCs.RT.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"I'm taking a chance" ... Lifehouse ... 'First Time'

I have learned that my first impulse is invariably the right one.
I can rehash all the pros and cons, and come up with a different decision, and I frequently do.
But, after thinking things over, I go back to my initial "gut" feeling, and go with it. I will admit that I usually refine it, or add conditions to it, but in the end, I'm back where I started.
Of course, I'm impulsive by nature, so that might be why it works for me.

 

[Cooker]

I like to go with my gut when things are not clear. If I'm wrong, well it will work out, always does.

The hard ones for me are making the right choice, turning right when I really want to keep going left But that seems to be my lot in life.

 

[Bina]

I do the pros and cons...stall......sleep on it.....stall.....re-do the pros and cons....stall......sleep on it.
What is helpful is to find a friend with really good logic and common sense and bounce it off of them.

 

[gadgetman]

What is helpful is to find a friend with really good logic and common sense and bounce it off of them.

That way yo' kin always blame them eff'n things don't wo'k out. Not my fault, no way, no how!!!

Cort,

"Hey y'all, hold my beer and watch this!!!" always wo'ks down hyar.

Bubba

 

[WayneGM]

Like others above, when there's no clear decision I go with the one that was initially my first "gut" reaction. I've rarely regretted it.

 

[Marguerite53]

Sometimes when the choice isn't very clear (assuming a genuine consideration of all the pros and cons), I will literally flip a coin. What I find then is that I am subconsciously rooting for a certain outcome. So if the flip comes out for choice A and I say to myself well I really hoped it would come out B, then I go with B and hope that my gut feel is correct.

OMG! That is EXACTLY what I do!! Works every time. It kind of tricks your gut into responding truthfully.

I like the 10 year test, too. Wisdom speaking there. Wisdom is always useful...sort of pre-reflective considerations.

Good luck, Cort!

Marguerite

 

[hensylee]

from an older, wiser head in VR, here's my take:

eeny, meeny, miney, mo.............

 

[Cooker]

What is helpful is to find a friend with really good logic and common sense and bounce it off of them.

Good point Bina. Two heads are better than one most of the time. I have a friend who is very calm and does not go off half cocked like I do sometimes. It is good to have a sounding board.

Tom

 

[RCB]

Decisions

Decisions

When I am faced with that kind of decision, there is the voice of my father who passed away over 19 years ago telling me to always do what is best for the long run. I have always followed that voice and it has never let me down.