Harmony.... Fair. No, of course, it isn't fair for a person to be mowed down by a car when they are walking on a sidewalk. Fair? For one person to require two OHS in four years? No, of course, it isn't fair.
But who promised us fair in life?
We take the hand we are dealt and we play it the best we can.
We all observe so many unfair things happening around and to us. I gave up looking for fair a very long time ago.
Your fears are normal and usual. We all had/have variations on the same.
Your chances of doing fine are huge. Remember, the healthier you are going in, the easier the surgery/recovery will be. I went into my second OHS in excellent condition and it was very much easier on me than my first when I went into it very ill.
You can do it. You have to do it.
Delaying it does not do your heart or your psyche any good. Your tests show the status of your heart. It won't get better on its own.
You will find strength to pull on the same as you did when you had that horrible accident. You survived that and have recovered and you will do the same with your heart surgery.
TRULY, the anticipation, worry and wait really are the worst part of this for just about all of us.
Please let us know how we can help you.. If you have questions you prefer to not post, please feel free to PM me and I'll do my best to help.
You are strong. You have proven it.