Anyone obsessed about dying?

[blessed1416]

Thanks for the positive thoughts

Thanks for the positive thoughts

Thanks to all who lifted me up. It saddens me to think that this has been somewhat a normal response - like someone said, we all have to face our own mortality at some point. Maybe by us facing it now, we may actually be better prepared for it when we are faced with it.

Marguerite, I feel for you having to deal with your father's dementia. My mother lived for 10 years with Parkinson's and her medicines contributed to her dementia, so I know the challenges you are dealing with. The quality of life has to be considered for those suffering. You are in my prayers.

Tom, you hit the nail on the head. I am posting a big sign on my refrigerator:
STAY FOCUSED ON LIVING- ONE DAY AT A TIME!!

I am so very blessed to have lived this long. I know of the promise of a better life - a new body, a healthy heart, no more pain and suffering. Praise God for this promise. Love you all, and sending lots of prayers for everyone here at VR

Gail

 

[the art den lady]

Hi there,

I haven't read any of the other replies, but I felt compelled to write. I just finished surgery on the 16th. Before I went in I was calm and through it and now after. (I'm still in the hospital.)

I rested on Philippians 4:6-7. ?Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God, and the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and mind in Christ Jesus."

We're all going to die someday. I think too many people focus on suffering & dying & death that they don't live. Take each day as it comes, living in each moment. Love and accept ALL people where they're at in their lives. (God is the judge, we're not.) We don?t know what hell on earth they might have grown up in. It might just take kindness and acceptance from 1 person to help them move forward.

In Dec. 2005, my dad was in the hospital and I felt compelled to be at his side the last week of his life. We all knew he was going to die. He had no swallowing mechanism left and pulled out the feeding tube from his nose and then he chose to just stop. He basically starved for 2 weeks.

Two days before he died I was sitting by his bedside and he said to me, ?Do you know that God is here?? I couldn?t believe what he said because my dad was not a church going man and so I asked him, ?Did you say, ?Do you know that God is here??? He said, ?Yeah.? I said, ?Absolutely, dad.? Now that doesn?t mean he?s going to heaven. I don?t know either way, that?s up to God. I just know God was there with him.

Through that experience and now my experience, I know without a doubt that God walks with us and protects us when we pass over. Does that mean we go to heaven because God is with us? Again, I don?t know that answer, but I do know the bible states clearly, ?If you confess with your mouth, ?Jesus is Lord,? and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.? (Romans 10:9)

God loves us with an unending love and He doesn?t want that any of us should perish. From the 2 weeks that I?ve been in here I surely would not want to go to hell where the bible says you suffer eternally. No thank you! I already saw a glimpse of that. I?d much rather live eternally.

Sorry to get so philosophical, but hey, it?s after 3 am and I couldn?t sleep.

Jackie

 

[toughcookie]

Death and dying

Death and dying

I'm 35 and had emergency OHS last Sept. I was given a 1 in 3 chance of not surviving. Had to say goodbye to my family - but didn't get to for my 2 year old son. Maybe it was the meds, but I was kind of okay with dying. Something you probably can't say unless you are staring it in the face. Again, maybe it was the meds, but my two beloved kitties who predeceased me were there in the ICU. And an aunt I loved, who had died in the early 90's. Those things made me feel a lot better and calmer. Would you believe I told my sister what to play at my funeral (Jeff Buckley, Hallelujiah)???!?

After waking up COMPLETELY THRILLED, for the first few months, I worried more about OTHER people dying. Like my son. When you come so close, you know that it can happen. I still can't imagine what my husband / mom, etc. went through waiting to see if I'd live. There was a lot of fainting, yelling and crying, so I'm told.

These days, I wouldn't say I'm obsessed, but I'm definitely not sure that I'll live a long life. Even though the doctors assure me that I will. I'm thankful for every single day.

Give it time. Everything is taking time, the physical healing, the emotional healing, and the mental healing. And don't ever be hard on yourself. No one is a survivor, if we aren't.

While I wouldn't say I was obsessed with dying I certainly think about the possibility more than other people my age who have no serious medical conditions. (I'm 38). It just doesn't occur to most of my friends that something could happen to them. I know rationally that I have a very good chance of surviving my OHS when I have it but the odds always say 1 in 50 or 1 in 100 and I guess I think what if I am the 1

On a positive note - being more aware of my mortality makes me enjoy each day more and certainly has enhanced my relationships with my spouse, child and family as I really appreciate them

 

[Superbob]

Wow, toughcookie, you are aptly named! That is a compelling story. I have heard of people having a near-death experience and seeing their loved ones who have passed. It sounds like you had one (or, as you said, it could have been the meds. My dog woke me this morning from a dream in which I was having lunch with Mitt Romney. I think that must have been my sleep med at work ). In any event, what you said is thought-provoking. The message for us all is to relish every moment, every day, and make the most of our time. None of knows how much time we have on this Earth and we can only have faith that some day we will be in a Better Place.)

 

[sue943]

Not so much obsessed with death as having come to terms with it.

Two years ago I was fully confident that I would live to be in my eighties. Then I had my stroke and found out about the endocarditis and then the valve damage and everything changed.

I had my OHS knowing that I might die but not worrying about it, I had tied up the loose ends as far as possible at that time, my will needed to be re-written but there wasn't time to organise it.

Now I feel less confident about living to be in my eighties, I realise that I could get endocarditis again at any time and next time I might not be so lucky.

I have finally got around to re-writing my will, I have shown my daughter where everything is kept, left a list of contact details for my financial affairs. If it happens it does, there is little I can do about it so I am not afraid.

I hope to be around for a good many years to come, I still look at the lifeline on my hand and see a long life - I just hope my money lasts me out.

What is much more worrying to me is not death, it is ill-health and not being able to be independent. I would rather die. I will not live with members of my family, I do not want to, I suppose I would rather go into care.

 

[toughcookie]

Thank you, Bionic Bob.