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PART 1 ... SELECT QUOTES, Ambrose Bierce's "Devil's Dictionary":
Arrest = Formally to detain one accused of unusualness
Corporation = An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility
Dictionary = A malevolent literary device for cramping the growth of a language and making it hard and inelastic. This dictionary, however, is a most useful work.
Electricity = The cause of all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else.
Justice = A commodity which in a more or less adulterated condition the State sells to the citizen as a reward for his allegiance, taxes and personal service.
Logic = The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
Philosophy = A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
Road = A strip of land along which one may pass form where it is too tiresome to be to where it is futile to go.
Zeal = A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced.
PART 2 ... SELECT QUOTES, Lexophile Humor
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then, it hit me.
Police were called to a day care where a 3-year-old was resisting a rest.
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
A thief who stole a calendar got 12 months.
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it!
The dead batteries were given out free of charge.
A will is a dead giveaway.
A calendar's days are numbered.
Cort:34swm."Mr Monte Carlo.Mr Road Trip".pig valve&pacemaker
WRMNshowcase.legos.HO.models.MCs.RTs.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"I knew what I was talking bout" ... Jimmy Wayne ... 'Do You Believe Me Now'
Arrest = Formally to detain one accused of unusualness
Corporation = An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility
Dictionary = A malevolent literary device for cramping the growth of a language and making it hard and inelastic. This dictionary, however, is a most useful work.
Electricity = The cause of all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else.
Justice = A commodity which in a more or less adulterated condition the State sells to the citizen as a reward for his allegiance, taxes and personal service.
Logic = The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
Philosophy = A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
Road = A strip of land along which one may pass form where it is too tiresome to be to where it is futile to go.
Zeal = A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced.
PART 2 ... SELECT QUOTES, Lexophile Humor
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then, it hit me.
Police were called to a day care where a 3-year-old was resisting a rest.
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
A thief who stole a calendar got 12 months.
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it!
The dead batteries were given out free of charge.
A will is a dead giveaway.
A calendar's days are numbered.
Cort:34swm."Mr Monte Carlo.Mr Road Trip".pig valve&pacemaker
WRMNshowcase.legos.HO.models.MCs.RTs.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"I knew what I was talking bout" ... Jimmy Wayne ... 'Do You Believe Me Now'
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