Vicious cycle

[Michelle D]

I get anxious before bedtime, actually as soon as it gets dark. Since surgery I have vivid nightmares, many of them each night. I wake up as soon as I realize I'm dreaming and so I can't sleep more than two hours at a time. I think the anxiety of having another nightmare gives me one. Valium doesn't work, Xanax doesn't work, ambien makes it worse.

 

[ottagal]

Michelle,
I have been reading your posts and know that you suffer from anxiety in addition to dealing with the trauma of your post-op complications. I think JM7 mentioned possible Post Traumatic Stress...you may want to explore this and consider cognitive behavioural therapy. It may help to talk to someone (even if you are going to school to be a counsellor) to help you through this (even if it is temporary). Hopefully, 'this too shall pass'.

I did have to resort to sleeping pills post-op esp. as I was not sleeping well at all and dealing with anxiety etc. (including nightmares) from my post-op complications. I ended up using a very small dose of Imovane for awhile and this is the only medication that actually helped me sleep.

P.S. Sometimes the mental/emotional recovery can take as long if not longer than the physical one.:wink2:

Good luck,

 

[Bina]

Nightmares hit me around 4 a.m. after sleeping for a few hours.
It is an awful feeling to be startled awake with a racing HR and it has been a possible side effect from the Metoprolol. Over time the episodes are farther apart and if I have a rough patch during the night I take 6mg of Metoprolol to calm things down so that i can sleep again until morning.
No scary movies or weird foods for me during the evening also helps.

 

[Michelle D]

I emailed a therapist that seemed to fit my needs and she can possibly see me Monday if it doesn't conflict with my other appt. I guess having the knownledge of how to fix these problems doesn't mean you can use it on yourself. I can cut hair as well but not my own. As I wrote all my mental problems in the email to the therapist I think I do have PTSD, I think I need to forget what the manual says. I had a traumatic event followed by other stressful events (ie., subsequent hospital admissions) and I'm stressed out about it. I'm definetly not qualified to deal with PTSD. I have a PTSD textbook and I've read the entire thing (for fun if you'd believe that) and it is much more complex than dealing with other disorders. I'm happy I'm going to get help, it gives me some hope that my mind will catch up with my body in healing. Thanks for listening.

 

[malibu82]

I have also been reading your posts pre and post surgery and I think it's great you are going to see a therapist. Sounds like you have a lot going on there. Hope it works out for you!

 

[kfay]

I agree about you needing to see a therapist at this point and I'm glad to see you've made a step in that direction. I saw one myself after this last surgery and I don't think I was anywhere near as stressed out as you seem to be and I was helped by it tremendously in only 3 or 4 sessions. I really wish you the best of luck.

Kim

 

[Philip B]

Bumps in the dark?

Bumps in the dark?

I had the vivid nightmares for months following surgery and had a bad bout with post-traumatic stress syndrome a few months following surgery. I really avoided meds that would make me sleep as I figured any kind of depressant would make me feel worse.

I did have to take Zoloft to take the edge off my depressed state. It didn't cure me and I still had to work pretty hard to get back to normal.

-Philip

 

[Robb Wilder]

I have just had VIVID Dreams since the surgery or actually its since I started taking the pill medication. The only one that I would consider a nightmare was trying to save someone from a hole and I fell in it and it wouldnt let my chest expand to breath. Of Course that was the second night home from the hospital. Other than that they have just been very vivid and interesting dreams. Nothing scary and sometimes actually cool when I can remember them

 

[Michelle D]

I stopped the ambien and I'm sleeping better because I'm not having vivid dreams to wake me up. Today I go to the therapist as long as I don't vomit. I ate mayo that was 6 months expired yesterday and now I'm feeling a little nauseous. I didn't know it was expired. I'm hoping this is just a passing feeling and I don't have food poisoning. There's nothing I hate more than throwing up (perhaps a phobia of mine)

 

[Marcia58]

Michelle - I freaked out one day in ICU, and started to freak out again a couple days later in step-down. In both instances, they had given me Ambien the night before, and my neuro pinned at least partial blame on the Ambien. No Ambien, to freak-out. Ambien apparently makes me paranoid delusional—Lunesta lets me sleep like a baby!

 

[AgilityDog]

I hope your tummy lets you see the therapist. Blech. I hate tummy problems, too.

I think you are very wise to see a therapist after what you have been through. I had a rough time 4 years ago, but you've had it worse, with additional hospitalizations. Nightmares, being afraid to sleep, anxiety, depression, PTSD. The whole shebang. It's fairly "normal" for someone in our positions, I mean, some of us come pretty near dying for pete's sake. But "normal" doesn't mean you can get through it without help, or that it's not very real and needing treatment just like our hearts did/do.

 

[Michelle D]

I've been taking ambien for a long time and while presurgery it did give me crazy dreams they weren't scary ones like after surgery. Without ambien I don't have dreams that I can remember so I'm happy to get off of it. I think I'm okay as far as my stomach goes, I think I was making myself feel ill by worrying about it too much. That is why I don't read side effects of my meds, I will psychosomatically give myself the side effects. I have my husband read them instead and I tell him when something is wrong. I'm excited to see the therapist today, I don't want to take anti-anxiety meds anymore. From school I know that anti-anxiety meds without therapy lead to rebound anxiety after getting off of them.