Quick Update

[MelissaM]

Howdy! I've been in lurk-but-can't-find-time-to-post mode for awhile. Sorry to have missed posting on some of the happenings of my VR.com family, but know that I've been sending good vibes from afar.

Life continues to speed along in overdrive. I've been working on renovating the condo - installed new countertops, sink and disposal, still need to tile the backsplash in the kitchen (maybe this weekend?). Still commuting an hour each way to get to a job that sucks the life out of me, then going home to tackle consulting work. Oh yeah, and fit in some fun now and then.

Next month I will take a much needed break and travel down to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. Any advice from my fellow VR.com travelers?

Sailing season revealed that my sternal wires NEED TO COME OUT! They are a pain when yanking on ropes and hurt for several days afterwards. Just made an appointment to get them out the beginning of August.

Went to see the eye doc about visual disturbances - he said my eyes were fine and he thought microembolisms were causing the peripheral vision to go. He wanted me to go for more follow up, but based on our last visual disturbances discussion, it doesn't sound like more follow up will reveal anything. Thoughts?

Almost ten months out from surgery and life seems to have returned to normal. I sill struggle emotionally with being overwhelmed and feeling that my life could fall apart at any minute, but I guess that, too will fade with time.

TTFN,
Melissa

 

[tommy]

Melissa,

Good to hear from you.

Pulling on ropes 10 months out? You sound like you are doing real well. As for that "will fall apart any minute feeling" it fades with time. The fading was greatly accelerated (putting it mildly) when I discovered VR.com.

Good luck with the eyes, don't have anything to offer you.

 

[fyrfytr]

Hey Melissa,
Good to hear from you. Have been wondering about you, sounds like you are as busy as ever.
Sorry to hear you have to have your wires out. I don't know if I could of pulled on ropes 10 months out.
I am going to see the eye Dr. this afternoon, I have been having some problems.
Miss reading your posts, you are a big inspiration to all.
Looking forward to seeing you at the reunion.
Take Care

 

[Nancy]

Hi Melissa-

Gee whiz--sorry to hear that your heart surgery has put such a crimp in your style

My goodness, girl, you sure sound wonderful. Glad to hear you're enjoying life!

Fyrfytr--let us know how things are going, you left a little mystery there.

 

[Ross]

10 months ago, I heard a sister of mine telling me about what poor shape she was in financially and was very worried about starting all over again. Glad you did! Congratulations!

 

[hensylee]

Good to see you, Melissa and hear you are doing so well.

How's the Honda?

 

[tobagotwo]

Melissa,

For the visual disturbances, go to an opthalmologist. He can accurately diagnose any of the major causes, without pain or great expense, in about twenty minutes or so. His equipment can usually determine if there are microembolisms, atypical migraines, or martians causing the disturbances.

I believe it is very important to use an opthalmologist for these issues. Other doctors seem to almost universally go down the wrong path, looking for brain disorders, ministrokes, and cancer, ordering MRIs and other expensive (and sometimes painful) tests, and generally scaring the wits out of their patients. The odds are against those diagnoses.

The majority of these issues are harmless and can easily be explained by a doctor who is an eye specialist - an opthalmologist. Why other doctors have difficulty remembering the name of that specialty, I'll never know.

Best wishes,

 

[MelissaM]

Thanks for all of the support! The Honda is doing well - just turned 200,000 miles and promises to hit 250K with ease.

Nancy - you take care of yourself and know that you have lots of prayers coming your way from here!

Recovery has felt a bit like turning a large ship around - takes a lot of effort and moves very slowly, but eventually the ship gets pointed in the right direction again. Just have to watch out for those underwater currents that want to turn the ship back in the wrong direction again!

As for the eyes. . .I went and saw the opthamologist first. It was he who suggested the microembolism theory. Since following up on that theory could possibly involve lots of yucky tests, I think I will try an aspirin a day and see if that helps any. (no pun intended)

 

[Sherry]

Hello, Melissa,
Glad to see you posting again. In regard the visual disturbances, I've been plagued with them on and off for years as you have. I finally broke down and saw an opthamologist last week. He dilated my eyes and found nothing. He said the occular migraines are common and that the spotty loss-of-vision episodes are just microemboli landing in the tiny arteries around my eye. He indicated that if they ever last more than a minute or so, he wanted to check me again but basically not to worry, that a fair number of people suffer from these disturbances. I don't think we'll ever find answers, unfortunately.
BTW, have a great time in Mexico. Stay away from that Tequila

 

[Karlynn]

Melissa,
So good to hear from you. I loved your analogy of turning a big ship. Have fun on your much deserved vacation.

 

[M&M]

So good to hear from you Melissa

So good to hear from you Melissa

Melissa, you sound so much better than when I first read your posts many mos ago. I remember when I first visited this web and you had so many questions and so many concerns - so many reached out and helped you with advice and especially to come to terms with your concersn. You have really grown so much and you have come such a long way - you were such a big inspiration to me - and now I can see you've done very well in handling part of life's many 'adventures'.

I do know what you mean when you speak about the 'feeling overwhelmed' - from time to time. Over the years - I myself have felt "overwhelmed" and wonder if I have the strength to face whatever my future holds - I tell myself - if I found the strength before - I know I can find the strength again. I have learned from my past - and I am stronger - asking for the support from my friends and loved ones - I can do anything - if I set my mind to doing it..

Melissa - I think you've a very strong person and I know if and when you need to draw on your strength again - you will handle life's challenges well. You are alot stronger than you give yourself credit for. What you have been through is more than others can ever imagine. Yet, you did it very courageously. I think your a very strong person.

Good Luck and
Best Wishes
Marilyn, Dick and Judy

 

[bvdr]

Hi Melissa,

It sure is nice to hear from my surgery sister again. I've been wondering what was going on in your life. It sounds like your condo is coming along really well. I love ceramic tile but have never done any laying of it myself.

Any chance of changing jobs? It doesn't sound like you are real fond of the one you have. You used to like your job with blueberries....any chance of doing that again?

It does sound like a vacation will do you some good. I've been to Cabo San Lucas but it has been a few years and it was only for a day. I know they have wonderful snorkeling and diving but the day we were there the sea was awfully rough so we chose not to fight it and just shopped instead. The town itself was very charming.

I know what you mean about the visual disturbances. My PCP suggested I get a neuro work-up for my "complicated migraines" (what we refer to around here as ocular migraines). I've had my fill of medical stuff this year and right now that is the last thing I feel like doing.....so I won't .I'm already on coumadin so that already offers some protection. You, however, aren't on any anti-coagulant are you? I don't really know what I would do in your case. Maybe after your sternal wire removal is completed you can revisit the issue and know better what is right for you.

Take care of yourself and have a great vacation!

 

[Raverlaw]

Melissa,

Good to hear from you! Hey, where does someone who lives in Boulder go sailing? What do you sail?

When I was a kid, I sailed Sabots and then Lasers when I was a teenager; we also had an International 14, but there weren't very many others on the West Coast, so no class races for those.

Sorry your sternum wires hurt - perusing the posts here, that seems to be a lot more common among the women than the men.

Advice for Cabo - Don't drink the water ! And be sure to try out some ocean kayaking while you're there - it is really a blast.

I also liked your big ship analogy - I'm still slowly completing the turn, but I'm far enough around to see where I want to go. Full steam ahead!

Job advice - even if you're in a job that sucks, if it works for you financially, keep at it for now. Just keep your eyes and heart open for other opportunities. I've found that the best jobs come along when you're not really looking for them. Hey, wait a minute - that works for life partners, as well!

 

[MelissaM]

Thanks for helping me feel a little less overwhelmed. I plan to leave most of my worries on the beach. Speaking of the beach, letting go seems a little like holding on to sand. Even if you hold on tight, sand seeps out of your hand until only a fragment of the original fistful remains. Those last remnants of sand are our memories.

Keeping my eyes open for a new job - part of the reason I went to the eye doctor.

I'll drink a margarita or two in honor of all of you!

 

[AmyCe]

Hi Melissa,
Wow...I feel the same way. I just had my AVR surgery in February and I am waiting for the other shoe to drop. Everytime I have heart palpitations I have to stop and listen for the familiar tick. My grandmother also had a bicuspid aortic valve and had hers replaced in 1976. She just died two years ago at age 89. I try to think of her everytime I start to feel overwhelmed or nervous. I'm glad to hear from others that this feeling will eventually fade.

 

[tobagotwo]

Just your luck to get a smart--s opthalmologist. Probably had a minor in Neurology...

Neurologists write a great deal of very scary stuff about migraines. I was perusing some of their migraine material the other day and I couldn't believe - literally couldn't believe -what I was reading. Some of it was dire predictions, but nowhere did I see anything that pointed to anyone who had actually progressed to anything else from a diagnosed "occular migraine.' No case histories. No studies other than simple observation and supposition.

By the way, the mircoembolism thing, sometimes referred to as the cause of some occular migraines, is usually referred to as a "theory." As such, it may not even be accurate, and may not even be what's happening at all.

Another theory, quite popular, is that it's caused by blood vessels dilating (you used to hear it was caused by vessels constricting). That group of neurologists says that most medications given now are vasodilators, and thus completely the wrong chemicals, making things worse.

I like the aspirin-and-beach approach you propose. It sounds to me like you (and Betty) have figured out where this belongs in the scheme of things. My occular migraines are precious to me: I didn't take major drugs in the seventies, so I don't get flashbacks like most of my peers. OMs make it so I don't feel left out. Other than that, they're not of any concern to me at all.

As far as I can see, they have no cure for these. So what is the point of testing? And if anticoagulants worked on them, mech AV owners wouldn't have them now, would they? Yet they do.

Sounds like a bunch of snake oil salesmen to me. If they didn't have diplomas on the wall, I bet there'd be people lined up at the BBB, and the 60 minutes crew would be swarming through their offices. All things considered, I'm not going to put their kids through school on pointless tests.

Enjoy Mexico. Relax, but don't get so lazy that you don't get in snorkelling. Try bringing a can of spray cheese underwater with you - it's a riot to feed fish with, and much neater than most other foods. Khaluha is really cheap there. Don't forget that ice is water, too, so no ice in any drink that's not suitably protected with alcohol!

Best wishes,