Need help with Stress and Sleep

[LoriSue]

Hi guys. I haven't posted in a while but I have been lurking. I have been feeling pretty exhausted and overwhelmed. Between teaching 10 credits at school, planning the wedding and reception, dealing with a 14 year old soon-to-be stepdaugther, stopping smoking (7 weeks thank you very much), coordinating plans for graduate school in the fall, passing out on occassion, doing some of the most bizarre medical exams I have ever been through, falling blood pressure upon exertion, falling blood glucose when I eat carbohydrates (yes, it falls), dealing with a PCP, neurologist, and cardio, I am seriously at the end of my rope.
I am done. I am overwhelmed. I am exhausted. I have so much more to do. I am so stressed.
I took my wedding dress in to get hemmed tonight (I am 5'0") and it wouldn't zip up again. I don't know how that happened, it zipped up two days ago and now it is 2 INCHES too small. How can a person gain 2 inches in 2 days? The waist is okay...it is too small in the upper back. I know my feet and ankles swell from fluid but I find it hard to believe that I could magically grow two inches around my chest. God knows my bra size didn't increase.
To top it all off....my caterer called and informed me that she can no longer caterer the reception because she got a new job and can't get off work. What I am supposed to do?
Sleep would be a welcome commodity at this point. Sleep for days would be worth its weight in gold to me.
I only have until June 15 to have everything in place before I leave for Vegas for the wedding. And before then I have a few weeks of lecture for both classes, each class also has two more exams and a lab final in the second week of June. I have 75 students and they run me ragged.
On a side note......
Does anyone know what Dysautonomia is?
Has anyone had their Trigeminal Nerve shocked as a diagnostic procedure?
Does anyone want to trade lives with me right now?
Lori

 

[Abbanabba]

Hey Lori,

I don't know if I can offer you much in the way of advice, but I sure understand the frustration you're feeling right now.

Just remember - things eventually get to a point where they can only get better!!!!

Hang in there!

Anna : )

BTW - congratulations on giving up the ciggies!

 

[LoriSue]

GEEZZZ, I just read my post and it felt like it came out like a river bursting through a dam. I didn't even put everything in there. Sorry for venting to such an extreme. I didn't realize how much was pent up.
No wonder I am having trouble sleeping.

Thanks Anna,
Lori

 

[Ross]

Hey here's a suggestion and I know your not going to like it, but stop worrying about the wedding. Put someone else in charge to take care of that stuff or go with a simple before the judge wedding where you won't go nuts trying to figure out what to do and where to go. You want it to be a day to remember, not a day to remember in the worst possible way.

Your all worked up woman. Things will work out and if it doesn't all go as planned, tell me of something in life that does! It's not going to be absolutely perfect no matter how hard you try to make it so. Little Monkey Wrenches are being thrown from Heaven into our plans continually.

Must think more now.....

 

[hensylee]

LoriSue - my bro was dxed w/dysautonomia 2-3 yrs ago. I met an internist at that time who has it. He had to give up his practice because he kept passing out while w/patients and became disabled. Eventually he went back to school, studied this particular subject and was able to counsel/treat about it. He's no longer doing it regularly, tho, because of the condition. There was a lot discussed in Dr Rich's forum (about.com) and Dr Rich even wrote an article explaining it. It's rather complicated, has several names (none of which I can recall at the moment, except 'old soldier's disease'). If you go check it out in about.com - just do a search. I will try to hunt up something for you later today and see what I find.

 

[Granbonny]

Lorisue

Lorisue

I saw you on-line this morning. It was 5 a.m. my time..2 a.m. Your time? Did you get any sleep? Wow..and going to teach today? Do a www.google.com on Las Vegas Caterers. Must be a zillion who can do one in Vegas for you. Buy a shawl..in case the dress will not zip.. You need some sleep..Bonnie

 

[SJJ]

Lorisue,
Well I'm certainly not surprised you're having such trouble sleeping! That's a very stressful life you're in the middle of just now. I'm seeing this pretty much the way Ross is. Your health issues and your work responsibilities would seem harder to simplify right now than your wedding plans. Either turn the preparations over to someone else or change your plan and go for something very simple and elegant and forget about all the fuss that weddings usually imply. Your health, work, upcoming marriage, relationship with your prospective step-daughter and general state of mind are your life, the wedding is merely an event. And you sure don't want to be a basket case on your honeymoon! Don't lose your perspective on this. My husband's 16 year old nephew was killed in a car accident 6 weeks before we got married. We changed our plans had a very simple wedding with just immediate family members. We've never regretted that decision. I'm so sorry that you're experiencing all these complications. Your health is the most important issue though, so please don't jeopardize it. I'm sure you're going to be a beautiful bride and we want to see pictures!
Sue

 

[Nancy]

Hi Lori-

Wow! What stress!

When life gets this convoluted, I've found that the only reasonable way to handle it is to triage each thing that needs attention. Actually make a list and keep arranging it as you go through the list one by one. Try to find a solution for each problem. Can you delegate, can you put it off, is there a more simple solution, does it have to be done at all, which of these things are an absolute MUST, which of these things will give you the most stress if it doesn't have a good solution etc?

As you address each problem, move the most urgent (without a solution) to the top, and drop the items with a solution off the main page to another page. You get the idea. It will take a little time, but it is time well-spent.

You CAN tackle HUGE monsters bite by bite.

I hope things work out for you, you've got your hands full. God Bless.

 

[hensylee]

Dysautonomia, as I recall the explanation, is a failure or malfunction of the autonomic system.

Here's the first one article:
http://heartdisease.about.com/cs/womensissues/a/dysautonomia.htm?terms=dysautonomia

Here's the second one - for treatment:

http://heartdisease.about.com/cs/womensissues/a/dysautonomia_3.htm?terms=dysautonomia

Also search NDRF - National Dysautonomia Research Foundation


Hope this helps - at least to explain it. It's a tough situation to be in. I finally decided that maybe there isn't such a thing, only a collection of health problems all lumped together and called dysautonomia -

 

[LoriSue]

Ross, how did you know I wasn't going to like your suggestion? LOL
The one good thing that I did do was I had booked a wedding package at the Excalibur Hotel. That is nice because the wedding video, pictures, flowers, minister and stuff is taken care of. All I have to do there is walk down the aisle. I think the thing that is getting to me is that I am starting to get the RSVP cards back and am finding out that there are a lot more people going than I thought there would be. The chapel holds 65 so the number isn't a problem, it is just that I wasn't expecting to have so many friends and family there and now I am feeling the pressure (I am not really sure what the pressure is from but I am feeling it). I thought I was going to run away to Vegas to get married to avoid the whole big family wedding feel but THEY ARE FOLLOWING ME! LOL Just kidding.

hensylee, Thanks for the link I will check it out as soon as I am done with this post. The neurologist kept mentioning it and gave me the impression that it was the direction he was looking for a diagnosis. The reason they haven't run out and changed my valve already is because there is some other things going on and they want a clear picture of what is happening in my body. I like that plan, even if it does mean that I have to feel bad for a little while longer. I do get frustrated though and want everything over all at once but before that can happen we have to know what else is going on in my body.

Bonnie, you are right I needed sleep. I still do. I did get to sleep about 3 and I slept until almost 9. That is really good for me. I will just puttz around the house until 2 or so when I will go to work. I teach from 4-9 tonight but it isn't so bad on Wednesday because most of that time is their lab time and they are doing all the work. I just scoot around on my stool with casters and answer questions. The shawl is a good idea. My seamstress called with a good idea too...she said that she could remove the zipper and change it so that the back of the dress laces up. It would actually look pretty I think. The only concern would be how low it is. The back is pretty low cut for me. It isn't down to my butt or anything but it is lower than I am used to.

Sue, you are right the wedding is just an event. I think what I am nervous about is that my family from all over the country will be there and we haven't all been in the same room at the same time for at least 10 years and certainly not since my parents divorced 5 years ago after 35 years of marriage. I am not exactly sure why I feel "pressure" but that is what it feels like. I will definitely not ruin the honeymoon.....we are spending 7 nights at Sandals Royal Bahamian all-inclusive resort. I don't even have to think while I am there. I can eat, drink, and sleep as much as I want. Just as long as someone wakes me up to turn me over on the beach so that one side doesn't get darker than the other. LOL

Nancy, I LOVE the triage idea. That is perfect. Maybe I should put Breathe at the top of my list. I thought about taking a day and taking a drive to the ocean. It is only about an hour away and for some reason the water soothes me. I grew up on Lake Michigan and never realized how much I would miss being away from it when I moved 10 years ago. Maybe I should sneak away tomorrow morning early and go for that drive. I could spend the day walking the beach and sitting and listening to the gulls. I think that is the best way to avoid a lot of chaos (tomorrow I turn 41) and find the peace and serenity that I so desperately need right now. Maybe right before I leave the beach I can sit and make up my triage list without any interuption or distraction. I do believe I have a plan. After tonight the next class I teach is on Saturday so there is no pressure to get back home soon. I like this idea. Thanks for getting my brain cells working!

BREATHE, BREATHE, BREATHE, BREATHE
(I am practicing)

Thanks all, I really needed some sensible advice at this point.

 

[Ross]

Lord girl what are you going to do when all 900+ of us show up?

 

[LoriSue]

LOL Ross, find a bigger hotel! LOL

 

[Nancy]

Of course, put BREATHE at the top of your triage list. That's the most important thing. Could cause the most problems if you don't, LOL.

Triaging after a relaxing day sounds terrific.

Let's see, "this one goes on my C list, this one goes on my B list, this one goes on my A list. This one doesn't go on any of my lists."

 

[Granbonny]

Hi Lorisue

Hi Lorisue

I want to wish you an early Happy Birthday..You sure don't look 41..I thought maybe 25. ..About your family..let them hash it out..Just not in the Chapel.. And remember this is your Wedding day..you don't have to worry about their problems or chatting with them..Just say..I'll spend some time with yall after the wedding. If they have problems with rooms, ect. it's their problem. Not yours. Will your Mom stay in room with you before wedding?..She will help to calm you down..and you can spend a little extra time with your Daddy later. Is your dress long or short?Lace down sounds nice.. About the sleeping. Have you tried Tylenol P.M.? Take 1 before you get into bed.I took them after surgery..for a few weeks. Helped me. Also, my friends who fly..take them to sleep on airplane and feel refreshed when they get to Europe, ect. About your new step-daughter. That is a hard age for her right now..Let her Daddy deal with her. My grandson will turn age 12 in July. He is leaving for a month with his real Mom for resorts in Mexico the entire month of June. Dread his coming back home. I will have to undo all his back talk, ect. that he knows not to do here. with his Daddy or me..but he knows he can get away with it when he is with his Mom.. A lot of peer pressure in their little minds at this age. See if you can find last week's Time Magazine. Cover on front about teenagers...Read that the last part of the brain to develop is the REASONING..and boys do it at age 12 1/2.. Bonnie