Jim's op tomorrow

[Gemma]

Hi,
Just got back with Jim's parents from the hospital having left Jim there. He's scheduled to be first into the operating theatre and will be taken there at about 8.30. Which means that we won't be able to go and see him beforehand as I had hoped and intended if he was having the operation in the afternoon.
I'd like your advice on something please. The anaesthetist told us that the operation will be about 3hrs, then Jim will be taken to the ICU where he will be slowly woken up and taken off the ventilator. All of which I knew, but Jim's dad has taken this to mean that we should phone up to see how he's doing at about 4pm and go down to see him at about 5 or 6 pm. This seems like a heck of a long time to me to wait and if I had my way I would be there at 8am waiting to see him as soon as humanly possible. And Jim's parents have kindly said I can go with them in the car instead of us driving separately, but I want to be there as soon as I'm allowed. So when do you all think I should be ringing? It may be that if I find out we can go sooner I'll be able to get his parents to come too, or just go on my own.
Expecting this to be the longest 24 hours of my life. I managed to keep it together until I got home then ended up in tears with my parents. And I know Jim's probably in the same state on his own in the hospital which makes me feel terrible. Although he's probably had some sleeping tablets by now and should be asleep.
I would appreciate any suggestions about ringing/visiting tomorrow. I know Jim won't know I'm there for a while but I can't bear the idea of him being awake and alone for any length of time.
Gemma
PS - will be thinking of Marcia B and sruss tomorrow too, hope all goes well and maybe the 3 of you will get that truck's # if you spread across the road in front of it. May even cause it to slow down and lessen the impact.

 

[Ross]

I would call the ICU desk or be there around 3 or 4. It's best to call first being that things are forever changing with schedules. Also, most shift changes occur around this time, so be prepared to wait a while. He certainly won't be with it enough to carry on any type of communication, but it will bring you peace of mind.

 

[hensylee]

I can certainly understand your wish to BE THERE during the surgery - I would, too.

Being the patient, I don't know how long it was after surgery that family was allowed in to see me. Perhaps some of our significant others can tell you on this one.

My prayers are with you both. God bless

and to Jim GODSPEED!

 

[sylviayasgur]

hi!
i can totally understand how you must feel.. joey was scheduled to go in for surgery at 8 am. we got there at 6:30 and i had to say goodbye by 7ish for his prep_ they wouldn't let me come.
he had a ross procedure, which i figured would take up to 4-5 hours, and by 12:30 i was asking the nurse in the waiting room to check with post op to see if he was there yet. he didn't get sent up to cicu until after 1:30!!!
i was a nervous wreck until dr. stelzer came down to let us all know how it went.
i did not get to go in and see him until about 3:30-4 o'clock and when i did see him, he was still intubated and very "out of it"_ not a happy sight (but he actually had some color, whereas seeing my dad like that several years before had me all choked up_ he was pale as a ghost and did not look alive!!!ugh! i'll never forget that).
we kept coming in and out of the cicu to see him in shifts. it took about 4-5 more hours before they moved him up to his own room and by 11 pm he was sitting in a chair!!!
i hope this has helped. please just try and be patient. i've learned that they don't always start when they say they will.
all the best, sylvia

 

[stephuk]

waiting

waiting

HI GEMMA HUN, IF YOU WANTED TO, YOU COULD GO TO THE HOSPITAL AT ANYTIME, THERE IS A RELATIVES WAITING ROOM OUTSIDE ICU JUST LET THE RECEPTIONIST KNOW YOUR THERE SO SHE CAN INFORM THE STAFF WHEN HE ARRIVES BACK FROM THEATRE. HE SHOULD BE BACK BY 1PM AND YOU WOULD PROBABLY SEE HIM ABOUT 2PM. STEPH WAS 2ND ON THE LIST IN THE AFTERNOON AND SHE WAS UP FROM SURGERY AT 5PM AND WE WENT INTO SEE HER AT 6PM, THERE WERE OTHER PPL THERE THAT WERE WAITING TOO SO DONT BE AFRAID TO GO UP THERE, THEY ARE REALLY NICE THE STAFF, JUST ASK WHATEVER QUESTIONS YOU NEED ANSWERING , I GOT TO THE HOSPITAL AT 10AM AND MYSELF AND HER MUM WAITED IN THE WAITING ROOM AT THAT TIME, THERE IS NO PROBLEM YOU WAITING THEY DONT MIND. AND GOOD LUCK TO BOTH OF YOU, 12 HRS IT WILL BE OTHER IM THINKING OF YOU

 

[Jan]

Jim's Surgery

Jim's Surgery

Hi Gemma

I will be thinking of you all tomorrow

please let us know how it all goes

Love

Jan

 

[Nancy]

Hi Gemma-

During all of my husband's surgeries, I was there to see him before surgery. I don't know if this is allowed where you are. I also stayed in the Waiting Room, until the surgeon called after surgery was completed. Then Joe was in the Recovery Room for an hour or so, and transferred into the ICU. I was able to see him shortly after that.

I always drove myself there and met any relatives at the hospital. I really didn't want to be on anybody else's schedule. I wanted to be able to stay or go according to what I wanted to do.

You will be under tremendous stress the day of surgery. The added burden of conforming yourself to someone else's schedule could be very difficult and you might end up being very annoyed at having to do that. Your instincts will be to be with your husband as much as possible.

Truth be known, and I know this isn't realistic, I would have preferred to wait all by myself, or with my daughters. Having to chat with a lot of people about silly stuff wasn't something I wanted to do. I just wanted to be quiet and wait. You will not be relaxed until your husband is out of surgery.

Bring some mints for yourself, your mouth will be dry. I also found that Immodium was very helpful. And bring something for headaches.

Best wishes tomorrow. God Bless.

 

[dwfreck]

Gemma,

I made the mistake of leaving my wife at the hospital in labor, to go see my own doctor because I was feeling so badly (24 hours without adequate food or rest), and letting my mother drive because I felt poorly. I ended up in an 80mph (130kph) race down the interstate highway (autoroute) with my mother at the wheel and my in-laws in the back seat to get back to the hospital in time to hold my wife's hand during her caesarian section. My mother had actually wanted to put lunch away before we left; I nearly killed her on the spot for not getting into the car. By the time we got to the hospital, I was feeling even sicker and wishing I had never gotten into the car; my mother drives by approximation (picture I small lady driving a big American sedan with the steering wheel always in motion). My in-laws and I have NEVER gotten into a car my mother was driving since then.

Needless to say, I agree wholeheartedly (while I still have a whole heart) with Nancy; drive yourself, set your own schedule, bring your own supplies.

If there's a window into the ICU or recovery area, the hospital folks might let you peek through it, so it never hurts to ask.

 

[Gemma]

Playing the waiting game

Playing the waiting game

Thanks guys,
You've all pretty much convinced me of what I was feeling already, having been awake since 7.30 am and not slept a lot last night I have decided to get there asap. I just got off the phone to the hospital, they suggested I could ring about 2pm to see what's going on so I guess I could just ring earlier and be there at 2 since it's a 45 minute drive. I'd rather not have to ring at 2 then wait to get there to see Jim.
Just need to ring his parents now and let them know. Can't decide if this is the end or the beginning of the hard part.
As for seeing Jim before the op, I suppose I could have gone up there but he's not a morning person generally so would probably have been woken up to have his pre-meds then promptly fallen asleep again! And I'm not convinced seeing me in floods of tears would have been helpful to him Have calmed down slightly but no doubt this is just the beginning of the rollercoaster of emotions. I keep telling myself I need to be strong for Jim at the moment, I think being on my own last night just brought it home to me that this is actually happening.
Hopefully we'll be posting in the post-op section shortly...
Gemma

 

[Ross]

He'll be fine and so will you. Calm down and take some deep breaths. It's going to be a long day, but don't stress yourself so much. He is in good hands and will be absolutely fine. He'll be out of it today and most likely most of tomorrow, but when he does come around, he'll want you there. Get all the rest you can now. You'll be a major player in his recovery.