In the waiting room with emotions I didn't think I would have

[Jayhawk]

I am officially in the waiting room as of today. My appointments with the Dr are now to be every six months rather than once a year. We talked a bit about what type of valve and which Dr. does the surgery. My heart function is still good and the measurements are pretty similar to last year. The difference is I am showing some signs - sweating profusely while on vacation to NYC in June, close to passing out after working out, short of breath, night sweats, my purse feels heavy and general fatigue.

I knew this time was coming and I am accepting of it. I am almost happy to have surgery and that makes me feel odd. I know it feels good to finally be closer to getting it done so it can be behind me. Looming over me for 47 years and its almost time. I am also excited to feel what if feels like to have a normal heart. Maybe this happy emotion is just covering up the sheer terror I am feeling? I don't know... I guess everyone deals with things like this differently.

 

[nngbwh]

Positive attitude :thumbup: We will be here when your time comes.

 

[pellicle]

you'll be fine

 

[ski girl]

Jayhawk I was also really excited about finally having surgery and getting to see what having a 'normal' heart feels like! I think that's the best way to be.

There's really no reason to feel terrified, this surgery is going to fix you and the chances of anything going wrong are teeny, so why not be excited? I can certainly do a lot more now than I could before my op and I'm not the only person on here who feels the same.

But considering you've progressed to being symptomatic, why aren't they scheduling surgery now, instead of just moving your checkups to every six months?

 

[epstns]

Jayhawk - I, too, waited many years between diagnosis and surgery. Not as many as you (diagnosed at 52, surgery at 63), but long enough to have had similar feelings to yours. It is good to enter into these things with a good attitude. Then, no matter what happens, you will be calm, knowing that eventually things will be better than before surgery.

As nngbwh said, we will be here for you before, during and after.