3 days until surgery !!

[BSastry]

My husband Aruna's surgery is only 3 days away ! Fri, 10/22. We are getting some last minute chores done at home. I want to let everyone know that this website has been very helpful to us. Our kids are holding up OK. Our daughter (13 yrs) seems more tense than our son (7yrs).

However, we need some last minute tips/suggestions as to how to deal with the scary thoughts that come and go. Everything seems so uncertain sometimes but when I read the postings here I feel better.

Another question is : During the surgery, does the surgeon himself come out to talk to us or do they send a nurse? I've also heard that the surgeon will talk to you over phone while he is in the OR.
Thanks.

-Bharati.

 

[countryboy]

also 3 days til sugury

also 3 days til sugury

My surgeon, Dr. Willian Ryan, Presbyterian Dallas, said my wife would be updated at least every hour during the procedure. He didn't say who would give the update. I am just like you trying to catch up on a few last minute things, but if they don't get done, so what. I have more important things to dwell on.
I had my heart cath yesterday and Dr. Ryan will do the Ross procedure unless my pulmonic valve is too calcified. I have an aortic bicuspid valve with stenosis and regurgitation.
I have only been on this site for 2 weeks but really appreciate the info and insights. Keep up the postive thoughts. Good luck--we will both come through in great shape.

May the Lord bless you,

Bobby

 

[Ross]

Best thing for you to do is read twoboysdad threads and momshell7. That about details dealing with these feelings.

The surgeon almost always talks to you in person after surgery. Of course, if there is an emergency requiring him, you may end up speaking with one of the other Doctors that were present during the operation.

Try to take some deep breaths and relax. I know it's not even remotely easy, but soon, it'll all be over.

 

[tobagotwo]

The best I can say about the scary thoughts is that they are inevitable, as we are human and we care very much what happens to our loved ones. The best you can do is acknowledge them and then divert your attention to something else.

Your husband may well find himself quite calm, shortly before the surgery. You may or may not share in that, so you and your family members should have things to look at or do.

Unfortunately, until he is out of surgery, waiting is the name of the game. While the actual heart work doesn't take that long, the entire procedure will usually take several hours, from final prep through rewarming. He will be mercifully asleep, but you need to have something to take away your attention for that interminable time.

Surgeons can use a phone that is normally in the operating room, but it is highly unlikely that he would do so during this type of procedure. Time is important in valve replacement surgery. I wouldn't want to disturb him, myself, even if he would - after all, we wouldn't want any dropped stitches! (Kidding, just kidding...)

You may receive limited information form a nurse or other news carrier during the procedure, but unless you are fortunate, they likely won't be able to answer many questions. The main surgeon often will come out to address the family after his part is done, but only if he is available. Sometimes they need to move right to the next case. Regardless, the proof of the operation is when the person you're looking for shows up in the recovery room.

I will be thinking of Aruna on Friday. And Bobby will be on my mind Friday, too.

Best wishes,

 

[Granbonny]

Hi

Hi

Your Husband will be just fine..He is having it at a very good hospital in Atlanta, Emory..I had mine across town at St. Joseph's They are both great hospitals... My neighbor had open heart surgery for bypasses 5 weeks ago in a small hospital in Macon, Ga. He drove 6 hours up here to the mountains last week. Doing great..Walking 30 minutes twice a day.. Family said, my surgeon came out and talked to them .mainly about the # of minutes he had me on the heart/lung machine.. Very short time.. I am leaving to go out of town..so, will wish the best for him now. Bonnie

 

[geebee]

I think you will find your husband more calm than you. I have been told by my SO that watching the patient is harder than being the patient (based on how relatively easy I had it - read pain pills and a bed to rest in).
As far as during surgery, it has been my family's experiences (and there have been 3 surgeries) that there is no update during the surgery. There was a nurse that came out to advise that the surgery was over and the surgeon was closing. Shortly thereafter the surgeon came out and spent quite a bit of time going over what had happened. I had a fabulous surgeon who was very willing to spend as much time as possible explaining things. He even brought my old valve out to show how it had been "sticking" shut which was what had required the 3rd surgery.
You may not find your surgeon as communicative. Some of them maintain their distance and are not always viewed as friendly. It just depends but it doesn't mean the care is not exceptional.
Once you get through the waiting (which is the hardest part), just remember when you see your loved one after surgery that, even if he has looked better, he made it through and the rest is necessary to get back to good health.
Best wishes and God bless,
Gina

 

[momshell7]

Good Luck!

Good Luck!

Hi, Just wanted to wish your husband the best of luck with his surgery!! During my husband's surgery we got phone calls from a nurse that was in the OR. We got the first one about an hour and a half after it got started. The next one came about that long after the first one. Fortunately for us, my husbands surgery only lasted three hours. Once they got in there they didn't have to do as much as they thought they would have to do. The surgeon came out about an hour after they said my husband was going to recovery. He came out and told us what exactly they did. He drew pictures and stuff. The ICU was not as scary as I thought it would be either. Since they didn't have to do as much when they got in there, they didn't have to cool him down as much so he color was very good.

I know this last week of waiting is so agonizing. The night before was especially difficult. I couldn't help but think that this may be the last time we do this or that together. But Jeff had started making plans for things would do post surgery and that really helped us to hang on. The surgery is being a routine one so that is very encouraging for all involved. I am so glad for the medical advances that are constantly being made. Who knows how things will be in fifteen or twenty years. Maybe this will be an outpatient proceedure!

If you need to talk, please feel free to email me directly. I am always on the computer so I will try to get back to you as soon as possible.

You will both be in my prayers! We are anxiously awaiting your arrival on the other side of the mountain. Let me just say. It is beautiful over there!!

Michelle

 

[Ross]

The surgery is being a routine one so that is very encouraging for all involved. Michelle

Rule number 1, this surgery is NEVER routine. It may have went well, but it's not routine.

 

[Bryan B]

I agree with Ross. It may seem routine for the surgeon and hospital staff, but it's never routine for the patient and family.

 

[dawnwit15]

Best wishes

Best wishes

I there, I haven't checked in on this site for a while and just saw your post. Best of luck to you guys on Friday. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Everything will be fine and things will be back to normal by the holiday season. Stay positive and keep your heads up. I swear the worst part of this surgery is the anticipation awaiting it to take place. The worst is almost over, hang in there!
Dawn

 

[momshell7]

Sorry!!

Sorry!!

I didn't mean to offend you all by saying that the surgery was routine. I was referring to the surgeons and how it is becoming more routine for them. They do so many of these surgeries that they really know what they are doing. They know what to look for when they get in there and are able to get the job done in an effienct manner. I know this is never a routine thing for the patient or thier family. I was a complete wreck in the months leading up to the big day. I read all the great things about Jeff's surgeon and the hospital and the surgery itself but I was still very scared and nervous. I am sure your husbands surgery will go very well. I will be praying for you.

Again I am sorry if I offended anyone buy making it sound like this a trivial thing, that was not my intension .

Michelle

 

[Ross]

Michelle you didn't offend anyone. I wanted to clarify for the new people that this surgery, no matter how many times it's performed, is never routine. Yes the surgeons can make it look that way and to most of them, it may seem like it, but I think if you really sat them down and hit on the subject, they'd say the samething.

No offense taken, Hopefully none given.

 

[BSastry]

thanks !

thanks !

Thanks for all your good wishes. You guys have been so supportive. All I am doing now is praying. ( of course besides running errands). My husband is holding up pretty well. I am the one who has been panicking. With only two days until the surgery, there's nothing much I can do, but just let it pass and hope for the best.
VR.com has been God-send to all of us. My husband even got to talk to some of the people who have gone through this surgery.
Well, tomorrow is the pre-op day. We'll be going to the hospital at 8:30a.m and we were told that the tests will take a couple of hours. After we get back home, we just want to relax (we'll try). I'll not be posting anymore until after the surgery. Thanks again to all of you.
Love ya,

-Bharati.

 

[terryj]

Just wanted you to know that my husband and I are thinking of you. We will be waiting to hear the good news after surgery. Until then you and your family are in our thoughts and prayers.

 

[Bryan B]

Michelle,

What Ross said. Some of us (me ) who have gone though OHS tend to be a little sensitive when the "R" word is used when talking about OHS.

Bharati,

I'll be thinking of you guys on Friday. The worst part is almost over...the waiting. Unfortunately for you the waiting will last a few more hours than for your husband. Once he gets his happy shot his wait is over. I can't help you with how best to explain the surgery to your children as I don't have any, and different hospitals have different polices on updating the family. In my case, one of the nurses updated my family approximately once an hour. Duke gives the familes pagers (like you see at some restaurants) and page them when it's time for another update. After the surgery Dr. Jaggers came out and gave my family a detailed report on everything. I hope everything goes smoothly, and remember that we'll be pacing in the "virtual" waiting room with you and anticipating your first post-op update!

 

[countryboy]

Good Luck

Good Luck

I enjoyed the conversation with your husband the other night. It probably helped us both. We will be having surgury more or less at the same time so we do have lots in common. Just wanted to send a message that you are in our prayers and God will watch over us both. We can have a successful recovery together.

Bobby

 

[bvdr]

I will pray the Lord will hold both of you very close to him and watch over you during surgery and your recoveries afterwards. I will be watching for posts letting us know how you did. For me the waiting was definitely the hardest part but I think part of it was that I was so looking forward to feel better again....and I do .

 

[breakingwaves]

I will add my prayers to the group's and wish you a safe voyage.